Saturday, July 25

A lonely Bitter Place

I am a jerk and a screwup
I have the wrong attitude about it.

It is more than just an effect.
There is real magic in the bottleneck.

As a mathematical term,
it means having your own base.

I know it is sacrilegious,
but I think atheists and agnostics need to understand that.

She is too much for me.
I can't handle that much.

She delights in driving me crazy.

I am crazy enough.
I don't need any help being crazy.

You were a siren the whole friggen time.

Is that the way you want to be remembered?

It was already there.
It was intentionally left undone.

I am never saying goodbye again.

Going to Florida is a sad memory for me.
I wish we could go to Disneyworld.

It has consumed my whole life.
I would of rather died on the beaches of Normandy,
or Vietnam.

You get a good view of that from the psych ward.

If you want to break tradition,
If you want to go in a new direction,
It is really hard.
I have been on this path for a long time,
and it is not as easy as it looks.

You don't know how hard it is to even get a semblance of a base.
It is not easy.
I don't think you can even do it by trying.
And you know it is going to be important in the future,
so you find yourself thinking backwards.

They can't talk about it because they are very valuable,
and you can't get there in the traditional way.

If I were unethical,
I would at least be in California right now.

I am already on the bad side of the establishment,
why should I care?

I need to start looking for somebody else.

This is friggen ridiculous.
Of course I am a man.
What was I before?
You people are wacko.

I am not happy.

If I am so damn precious,
what the heck am I doing here anyway?

Why can't I lead a normal life like everyone else?
What is wrong with me?

I am a lonely bitter old man now.
I could care less.

I need to stop my evil before something worse happens to me.

I wish someone had told me,
I was going to a lonely bitter place and it was going to hurt.

Monday, July 20

Magic in the Bottleneck

Name the shit and move on.
That is my motto.

It is all in what you are going after
it is both saturation.

Going after the April Fool's Day thing,
is going after saturation.
They are the same thing.
The universe doesn't care if someone came up with it first.
You get what you are asking for.

You want it, but you can't have it.
It is over.
It is done.
There is no undoing it.
Blame Freud.

From their perspective, I changed history,
and they are not happy about it.

I went after saturation and got an information burn.
That is all there is to it.
There is nothing I can do about it.

If I didn't care, why would I say anything?
Old worlds have massive hangups about this shit.
We need old growth.
The Universe is dying.

It is just bravado, just ignore it.

Cause Freud is a fucking idiot.
He shouldn't have said that shit.

This is what the word prove does to people,
and he knew it.
I have no love loss for him.

They thought at some point we would nail down everything,
and start over or whatever the hell they wanted to do,
but it aint going to happen.
It is archaic, outmoded, it doesn't mean anything anymore.

Creation is a type of world,
as Dr. Kaku explains worlds.
It has to do with information theory.
How many times do I have to tell you this?
The atheist agenda is a road that leads to ruin.
You shouldn't reject Marx, but accept Freud.
They both had the same agenda,
and it aint gonna happen.
This is a commie loving pinko fag telling you this.

Cause I care about you fucking assholes.
I don't want anyone to sink in an atheist sand pit.
Even if it is their own fucking fault.

I get frustrated and angry cause I am trying to reach you.
Don't fall for that crap.

I prove evolution then take God's side,
and it is driving them nuts.

The world is cruel,
and we are not here to have fun.

Can't you see I am doing important work?
I don't know what you want from me.

I am a sad tragic figure and nobody knows where I am going.
I have come too far to give it up now.

At least people knew they were real.
My contemporaries don't even think I am a real person.

If it killed Cantor, Boltzmann, Godel, and Turin
I guess I should leave it alone.

I am just a writer.
What do I know?

I wish someone pretty like that would care about me.

How long would that last?
I would flip out the first day.

I flip out.
It happens all the time.

It means I shake, shake, shake, until I end up on the couch again.

Here is some psychiatry for you.
If calling it information burn gets people to take their medicine,
What do you care?
You just want to keep uncertainty at bay.

I know there is magic in the bottleneck
cause I have been through the damn thing
I am not human anymore.

Wednesday, July 15

An OK Computer Just Doesn't Add Up

Somebody needs to do something.
Writing is going to die.

Reading the Bible qualifies you as well read these days.

I molded the darn thing.
You are supposed to keep 12 and throw 12 away.

Nobody can tell you how to do it.
It doesn't work if you know what you are doing.

I don't know if doing it wrong
qualifies you as having your own base.

I wouldn't mind,
but that would mean one of us would have to leave.

I feel sure he wouldn't want to treat me as an adversary,
but I understand why he might need to.

I know miracles happen.
I don't have to be convinced about it.

I am not just a Hitler who cant paint portraits,
there was a reason things ended up this way.

It is amazing I produced anything with that attitude.

They make lemons.
We make lemonade.
It has been like that for years.
Strawberries are rocking the boat.
They knew this was coming.
I guess an OK computer just doesn't add up.
It is a little too tricular.

I enjoy gadgets just like everyone else,
but sometimes you have to sit there and just think about stuff.

People need affection not gadgets.
People with their wireless gadgets scare me.
Don't waste your cramps and blisters on a cell phone.
Play the guitar or something.

I guess Mr Harris was right.
When your biological clock stops ticking,
you need something to entertain yourself with.

Go out and roller skate for Christ's sake.
Now I understand why grandma kicked us out of the house.

I was actually trying to accomplish something.
Nobody seems to understand that.

Anybody can Longcat.
It is not hard.

I need affection.
I am not used to this American way of life.
It is foreign to me.

I am in a living hell,
and I did it for you guys,
and I don't even understand you.

I am like a panda bear in a bunch of rhinos.

Pandas are black and white.

Do you listen to me at all?
Do you discount everything I say?
I am not saying
there are not paranoid or delusional aspects of my personality,
but this math shit is real.
I am a major fault line.
I am as big as John Lennon.

Because of Y2K.
I know you people.
You get into psychiatry cause you can't do the math.
Well math is everything people.

Me and my mother didn't get along so well.
There is that what you want me to say?
You people are pathetic.

This shit has been going on since elementary school.

I hope I don't die trying to prove anything.
I guess I am lucky to be a writer.
I will just name the shit and move on.

Monday, July 13

The April Fools Day Thing

I understand downtime.
It is a powerful motivator.
There are scores out there who would like to sleep like I do.
I just lay there for days and I love it.
Especially when I wake up and someone has given me a hug.
I do appreciate.
Thank you.
I apologize if it is turning out the same old same old.

What can I say?
He doesn't like being turned down.
That is the worst thing you can do.

I don't know.
It is all a big nightmare to me.
I got caught up in the brinkmanship.
Somebody did get hurt,
and his name is David Mallory.

If my clock runs slower than yours,
in a given amount of time,
am I in a separate universe?

Is there a limit to how many minutes behind you can be?

This math shit is real,
and it is happening to me.

I am not saying that there is not delusional aspects of my personality,
but this shit is not delusional,
this shit is real.

You can't do the April Fools Day thing and read.
You have to do it without reading anything,
or at least not a lot.

I don't know.
I just wanted to be Irish.

It comes from a different place,
but it is the same attitude.

The sad part is somebody could actually do it,
and it wouldn't change society's attitude about it.
They will still be tasked to treat you.
They will still have to give a diagnosis to the insurance company.

I know.
Why come up with something somebody's already come up with.
The answer is, you come up with different words.
Words that perhaps somebody else might better understand.
You have a better understanding of it if you come to it by yourself.

People are solution oriented.
That is game theory.
You wind up with an endless conundrum,
where the only proof is what you are capable of.

I am not sure little green men care about the game.

Proof ends in a conundrum,
and a conundrum is not proof.

Just like you can know the pieces by the way they move.
That is how you will know each other.

I am the one that makes decisions for the sake of making decisions.

I suffer from schizophrenia.
I am heavily medicated.
If you don't want to end up in a psych ward,
I suggest you don't try this at home.

I am with you.
I don't understand why I am getting away with it either.

They want it out of the realm of divine,
and yet they were the ones to put it in that realm to begin with.
Maybe I just don't understand the word.

I want people to have decisions.
I don't like this decisions that are his decision crap.
If they don't want to read it,
If they just want a cursory understanding,
That is fine by me.

It is just recourse.
I have explained the concept of recourse,
and I think everyone understands that.
That is all it is.

The only thing that can be changed,
is something that was purposefully left undone.
And nothing can be changed,
if there was no indication or warning about it.
But the real issue is not changing anything.
Everything that can happen has happened.
It is simply the issue of moving from one to the other.

That is the truth about y2k,
and why things are so different now.

What does that mean?
Things might be changeable,
but the conditions need to be right.
"With God all things are possible."

Christianity is flexing its muscle and they don't like it.

I accept Christ may not stay with me forever,
They don't.

What can I say?
God picks favorites and it drives everyone nuts.

People are a little overloaded with game right now.

People are saturated with game anymore.
Am I winning?
What am I winning?

When I make music, I like to get three or four things going,
like Stevie Wonder.

What would be a refrain or something,
gets all lumped in together and played at the same time.

I don't know.
I busted my ass and it sold one copy, mine.

Tuesday, July 7

The Vacuum of Lies

tell me to shut up already

People need truth.
Mother Nature doesn't listen.
Father Time doesn't care.

I am trying to get a rouse out of her.

I didn't read it cause it was Mad Dog 20/20,
I found the real thing.

I know what it is like to live in the vacuum of lies.

You made me feel good about myself.
You made me feel happy.

I wish someone would give me anesthesia three times a day.

It would shake the foundation of the world we think we live in.

You need to take the offensive fast and early,
or they are going to milk you to death,
and leave you with a dead cow.

These nations don't care about us.
We are just a roadside attraction to them.
A holiday camp.

This is a commie loving pinko fag telling you this.

I hate to say it,
but I think Japan is the only one that truly cares about us.

It is the damn inside outside shit.
I don't know why they insist on doing that shit.
It is just another way to divvy us up.

Like I said,
I have been in wards where we don't even exist.
One person came back from Roanoke and that is it.
Lightning hit fire people.

I am telling you,
we are a mythical joke to them.

Everybody wants to be a child in America.
No wonder I don't want to grow up.

I am calling them on it,
If they want to tell me to shut up,
let them tell me to shut up.

It is like waking up in a freakish nightmare.
God don't let the kids know
Jesus Christ

Don't worry about it.
It is just my creative genius gone haywire.

It is hard being asexual in America.
People can not get past it.
You are automatically some kind of pervert.
Your parents did something wrong.

How did Freud put it?
Sex is natural and normal.
It is no sex that is unnatural and abnormal.
Fuck you Freud.

They are atheists.
They are like Karl Marx.
They have never felt God's love.

You either accept the atheist agenda or you reject it.
You can't have it both ways.
You can't pick and choose.

I love my atheist friends,
but I am prepared to leave them behind,
and I am not going to feel sorry about it.

I told you.
Creation is a type of world.
It has to do with information theory.

I told you.
You don't have to worry about the GUT.
That shit takes care of itself.

If I didn't care, why would I say anything.

Television, automobiles, computers, cell phones,
We are making fun of creation.
It is all a big joke.

It is all a big time reversed joke,
and we don't even know it.

I am trying to get it out there.
It is not my fault nobody reads the darn thing.

Saturday, July 4

The Malleable Truth

They play cruel jokes on each other.
They call it lulls.

We cant be trusted with the power of creation,
until we start treating each other right.

If we would do that to the son of God,
what would we do to each other?

If you won't hear it from Jesus,
who will you hear it from?

It is right there for you to read it.
I know, I didn't want to read it either.

If he was willing to go to the cross for you,
you should listen to him.
He knew what was going to happen,
and he didn't back down.
He did it anyway.
He did it for you.

Would you rather hear it from Muhammad or Buddha?
Who do you want to hear it from?

I know you have problems with it.
I am asking you if you would rather hear it from someone else.

Even Satan would choose Jesus over those other two.

Face it
If you don't accept Jesus, you are stupid.
Jesus didn't do it for the lulls.

Who would you trust with your eternal soul?

This is a commie loving pinko fag telling you this.

I am telling it like it is.
I am not going to feed you with fluff.
You need to be careful whose house your living in.
There are slum lords out there.

It is the ultimate in altruism.
He cares about you.

I know Lewis and Freud had a conversation.
I don't know if Freud actually said that.

They say osmosis isn't real.
That it doesn't happen.
When it is real.
And it does happen.
Just like rouge waves happen.

When they can't demean it by saying it's delusional,
they say it is irresponsible.

Damn right I am scaring people.
I should be scaring people.

What is tolerated on Earth will be tolerated in Heaven,
and your patriarch is there.

People aint chemistry.
We have more than punch cards.

The golden age of science and reason is ending,
as we discover the malleable truth.

I’m worried about the bloodbath that’s going to happen if he does get elected again. I’ve been though this before  We may find a comfortable...