Comfortable Place In Purgatory

There really is one that keeps going

And I am not sure I want to be that one anymore.

It is going to keep me out of heaven.

I guess I am still a kid.

I may put $5 down once a month or so.

It isn’t worth spending a lot of money.

Some people see this meerkat stuff, and others don’t.

I am not going to force it. If it comes it comes.

I have a rasp in my voice that comes from not using it.

I guess I will just make music, and wait for the lyrics to come.

I can see how people get addicted to this.

If Willie Nelson can just talk, I guess I can too.

It isn’t the ideal situation, but I can deal with it.

I would be partners with someone who could write and sing.

I have a hard time loving myself. It just doesn’t feel right to me.

People get paid good money to come up with words and names and stuff.

I guess I am a self absorbed person that hates himself.

I wish I had more upper body strength,

I wish I could run,

I wish I wasn’t so fat,

I would like to be a more virile person.

Just a good airman, you know?

I guess I need to learn to just accept myself.

I feel like I am some boogeyman that she created.

Thank you for welcoming me to Hip Hop.

The way I remember it, I said if people were going to argue about it, I wasn’t going to play.

Mom said that never happened.

They did buy me a keyboard when I was 21,

But like I said I played it for years and got nowhere.

It is strange that this has occurred after they both have passed,

But I am not angry at them or blame them.

It just happened that way.

I don’t get lyrics every day. It is probably going to be a rare thing.

Some people wrap themselves up in the rules. It makes them comfortable.

Some people don’t care if they are a good airman or not.

A lot of people would be like, “put a bullet in my head”

I need to be prepared.  This might be a one time thing.

I believe in ufo’s.  But I think we are smart enough to make transistors, and fiber optics.

I am playing patience.

I heard the negative first.

He watches what you do, and he will do what you show him to do.

If you play free cell, and freely undo stuff, that is what he is going to do.

I am not sure what yzax is telling him to do.  Maybe he is telling me something.

Maybe it helps me find a frequency.

I don’t like it when people use the word energy or frequency that way,

But I can’t think of a better word.

It is hard to have your own connection, there is so much noise.

It is difficult for me to pull something out of a dream. I haven’t honed the skill.

It is a shame I don’t write and sing, some of these could be good songs.

Are things going to move to this?

I don’t really like Whether Or Not, watch that be the one everyone likes.

I was deciding whether or not I was going to use live loops,

And what genre I was going to do.

That “I’m weird” stuff was in the loop like that.

Do they get musicians to sit down and make these loops?

I don’t have a lot of control over what the final product is, but it sounds okay.

I had heard that “I’m weird” before, and I wanted to make it longer,

but I couldn’t get it to work, thankfully I ran across it again.

I was spending 10 or 15 hours a week in GarageBand,

You are going to discover stuff.

It is my TikTok.

I have to pace myself, or I would spend all day in it.

I hope they ain’t just sending me on an ego trip.

Back when I started this, it was called spam.

Now, on twitter, a lot of people do it.

I think things may become more or less surreal,

As we pass through the galactic plane.

I think people follow me, and get ideas, and make millions.

There might be seasons where we feel the “heat” of the Big Bang, like summer and fall.

It is just an idea, I don’t know how or why.

We might think it is an individual, but they are just the dust things crystallized around.

My nephew has millions of views over at TikTok, and it hasn’t affected him much.

I wonder how they make Apple loops, do they get musicians in a studio?

Can time collapse the way photons do?

You can seed a cloud and make it rain.

I guess this writing and singing stuff, I just going to have to do it myself, I am doing everything else.

I been there for over 20 years.  Why should I go somewhere else now?  It isn’t going to change my life anyway.

I started with GarageBand in 2018, so four years of continuous use.  That is about right.

Being on soundclick since 2001 seems like a long time, but there was like 10 years where I didn’t post anything.

I didn’t have no time for myself.  Jasmine was over here constantly. Bless her soul.

It may crystallize around an individual, but it is something that was going to happen anyway.

One time, many years ago,  I went on a road trip by myself, and I remember stopping at Wendy’s.

When she was around, it was nice having someone to go to Wendy’s with.

We did a lot of road trips together,  that was our thing.

I am going to continue to call things loose and organic, because they don’t have a professional feel.

Maybe sophomoric, and amateurish, but those sound bad and negative.

When you are playing free cell, and undoing freely, it is easy to think they are all solvable.

When you run into one that isn’t solvable, it is going to be a disaster.

Even if it is just extremely difficult, it might be a disaster.

I am happy with the audience I have.  I can deal with this.

A million streams don’t make you a millionaire. All it does is send you on an ego trip.

Seventh Guest was looking for insane people I guess.

How you play the game is what you are telling your subconscious to do.

I understood it was a computer.  I understood it could be programmed to give me a different result.

Did you know “funk” means “radio” in German?

If I can’t understand myself, I leave it that way,  it adds to the art of it.

Some have been around since December.  I wasn’t happy with them, so I waited.

I remember Chuck delivered meds that day,  I hadn’t even seen him in months.

Now the lyrics are loose and organic.

Don’t be surprised if tomorrow is a day.

I don’t know why Brannon is going to testify, if he is being charged anyway.

People hear what they hear.  That is part and parcel.

The lyrics get stepped on by the music, and people hear words you didn’t write.

People ain’t going to understand what I say anyway.

They may listen to it over and over to hear what I am saying.

People hear stuff when I don’t say anything.

Just some lyrics I had lying around. I don’t have anymore, and I don’t get them everyday.

I understand why actors practice their diction.

My voice is messed up from not using it.

I am going to listen to hip hop more. I call it hip hop because of the loops I am using.

I had to decide what kind of music I was going to make, and I really don’t care for electronica.

You don’t necessarily make what you listen to.

It wouldn’t be the first time I sunk myself.

I am not spending hundreds of dollars to go on an ego trip.

If you count the price of the internet, maybe I already am.

My quality may have improved, but a lot of people are doing it, and it’s not crazy wonderful.

It ain’t Jay-Z or Kanye West.

I am watching my email.

I have The Chronic on vinyl. I have recently acquired some Bohannon. I like listening to Funk on Amazon music.

That is a great value that Amazon music.

Who the heck would have WWG1WGA tattooed on their back.  That person has definitely had too much lead.

My lyrics are gibberish, they don’t make sense, and people don’t understand me.

I like soundclick.  I am going to stay there for now.  But I wish there were more regular people over there.

If I could bring people there, it would be good for everyone.

I am literally the old white guy that has been in the neighborhood for decades

I need to be grateful that I have exposure that other people don’t have.

I have an acquaintance that thinks he wrote all the Beatles.

You see? It isn’t supposed to change to begin with.

If John says it has to be free, I guess it has to be free.  I guess I vowed poverty somewhere along the line.

No one will have any idea this ever happened. Someone needs to be convinced to let go of it.

I just keep going, and I feel there is nothing I can do about it.

Listening to my own music is becoming part of the creative process.

Maybe in the future I will do one side with and the other without,

Like the Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer album. I love that album.  Sometimes I will play it in July.

I guess I will have to make my own videos too.

Sometimes you can get absorbed in stuff, and think it is a lot better.

He knows I won’t let him say some shit, so he sneaks words in there that sound like what he wants to say.

I think it is about oral sex, and not getting love from the music.

As I listen to it I hear different stuff, some of which I never would have said.

I heard, “she asked me once, she called me an asshole.”

I am a horrible, miserable, white guy.

It’s about making a clear break from the past, and how difficult it is.

If YouTube says I got 5 views, I guess that’s what I got.  It doesn’t seem that way.

You should always strive to create as opposed to just making something.

It is new to me and I ain’t copying nobody.

I am in this situation where I have to do everything, I don’t know how it got this way.

I probably have more people that can’t stand me, than I do followers or fans.

I could make seriously good shit and it wouldn’t get nowhere.

Considering I am doing it all myself on a glorified phone device.

I didn’t imagine computers would be handheld and merge with television and telephones.

I guess I come across as an arrogant self absorbed asshole.

I am thinking about the next person.  I want people to think twice.

I would do more promotion, but I am worried they are just sending me on an ego trip.

Part of it is just letting it happen, just being yourself.

Money is grand, but it can send you on an ego trip, and if you don’t fear God, you can get in trouble.

You may find a comfortable place in purgatory, but it won’t last.

Do they have to pay Steve Bannon every time they show that mug?

There were dragonflies everywhere today.

The situation is hellish but you ain’t burning in hell forever.

I think we are going to get a reprieve from this heat. But if we don’t do nothing it is going to come back and stay.