Like I said,
it is better than reading Sitchin.
I should have burnt that shit.
How many are reading their Bibles because of me?
That is the most important part.
Like that lady said,
"The best Bible is a read Bible."
Read the one you have been led to.
You will know which one it is.
I guess I am the bag lady of the internet.
She wants you to think I am a stalker and a control freak,
and I am not.
We ran into each other a few times,
but that does not count.
I am free to go to a concert or a record store.
She probably knows more about where I am,
and what I am doing,
than I know about her.
If I really knew how to make money,
would I drop everything and go to California?
Probably not.
It is just a step to the right,
and a jump to the left left left left left.
Its a dance you do in a black hole.
People thought I was crazy
when I talked about digital radio
and on demand movies.
I wanted to be online
as soon as I knew what Compuserve was.
I had a modem back in 87.
I got it out of Computer Shopper.
America Online was not even around yet.
I miss those days.
I feel like I am going through this for no reason.
I got a little stupid, I am sorry.
I love posting and uploading.
It is wonderful that I can touch thousands of people,
and never leave home.
Finally my websites show up,
and not that soundlink crap.
David999@brigadoon.com is me too.
can you believe that shit is still around?
I am glad I have a blog I can spam now.
I was trying to figure out what the hell was going on.
That damn word verification did a number on me.
I lost everything in 97
my job, my girlfriend, my apartment, my stereo, my credit, my car
my mind was already gone.
the only thing left was the computer and the television.
I signed up with brigadoon, because they did not require credit cards.
I liked to smoke pot and watch mtv.
The internet is magic to us schizos.
If that is what I am.
I blew my mind out in a car.
I didn't notice that the lights had changed.
Now they know
how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.
I am truly the wimper.
I don't know, it made me feel normal.
I felt like, this is what most people feel all of the time.
They would play shit in the background,
you only heard when you were stoned.
I rigged my boombox
and I liked to listen to ok computer with the volume really low,
and try to keep breathing.
It started in 95.
They were going to fire me and I flipped out.
I don't know.
My guardian angel took over my life.
I didn't realize I had any authority.
I didn't know they were doing that crap.
I didn't know I had the authority to tell them what to do.
They see these holes too.
They just don't say anything,
because they have grants to worry about.
You don't get money for implications.
There is something developmentally wrong with her.
I think we are looking at a lengthy stay in central state.
Monday, June 15
Tuesday, June 9
thats right
That is right.
I am unlucky, unworthy, and unholy.
If you can't read the whole thing,
just read John.
If it can save me,
it can save anybody.
It is not the question of whether it is John the disciple or not.
You have a book written by him.
It is a superlative.
It is not needed.
I don't know on who's authority I am saying this.
I think I have a spirit that does this type of thing.
I was caught in the conflict long before I realized what it was,
that is why.
It is a silent conflict that has been going on for centuries,
and it needs to be put to rest,
before this happens to somebody else.
I know you don't like this version of events,
but that is the way it is.
Deal with it.
Put it to rest before this happens to somebody else.
I was caught in the conflict
long before I realized what the conflict was people.
I couldn't be more innocent than that.
I don't want this to happen to anybody else.
Normally this wouldn't happen.
Normally I would be in a catatonic fugue
long before anything like this would happen.
It is the medicine that is doing this.
I know it has helped thousands of people,
but the medicine is a critical component of whats going on.
It cannot be denied.
They figure if you can't prove it,
they can do anything they want.
They feel they have license and mandate to do this to people,
and they don't.
The whole thing is feeding on itself and spiraling out of control.
I am being enabled by the medicine.
I have performed an illegal operation and need to shut down.
That was silly.
That is never going to happen.
I just wanted to scare the shit out of them.
I want to be out from under the thumb of Henrico County Mental Health.
I want to be free to be who I am going to be.
If I am going to be the Antichrist,
let me be the Antichrist,
I am tired of this shit.
It will be finished over and done with.
Either way this aint happening again.
Stop hiding me and keeping me at bay.
Damnit let's roll.
If I don't win its over.
I am a nobody.
Wes is the one that deserves it.
The world has really shit on that guy.
I forgot why we started this shit.
This shit is about Wes.
He has been shit on and I am seeking some justice for the guy.
I would take a 10% cut.
That's okay.
90% of the universe didn't happen.
That's okay.
That was recon.
I know what to do now.
Wes is a better second.
He listens and does what I suggest.
Most schizos are so caught up in themselves,
they wont listen.
I guess I know that I don't know.
It must be a hideous secret.
They are feeding it to me slowly.
I flip out all the time.
They are afraid I will flip out.
Don't worry about me.
If that is the place that is meant for me I will be okay.
Its when you are in the place that isn't meant for you
that there is a problem.
Hell is for Satan's angels.
I don't know why they want to drag people down there.
Why don't they just take the place that is meant for them?
It is full of everything they ever wanted,
and they won't take it.
It is full of everything they ever wanted,
and they insist on taking The Garden of Eden
away from Adam and Eve.
I don't understand it.
It is a very special thing to have a place created for you.
I should not worry about it.
Who cares about blame?
Just take what he gives you and be happy with it.
I am unlucky, unworthy, and unholy.
If you can't read the whole thing,
just read John.
If it can save me,
it can save anybody.
It is not the question of whether it is John the disciple or not.
You have a book written by him.
It is a superlative.
It is not needed.
I don't know on who's authority I am saying this.
I think I have a spirit that does this type of thing.
I was caught in the conflict long before I realized what it was,
that is why.
It is a silent conflict that has been going on for centuries,
and it needs to be put to rest,
before this happens to somebody else.
I know you don't like this version of events,
but that is the way it is.
Deal with it.
Put it to rest before this happens to somebody else.
I was caught in the conflict
long before I realized what the conflict was people.
I couldn't be more innocent than that.
I don't want this to happen to anybody else.
Normally this wouldn't happen.
Normally I would be in a catatonic fugue
long before anything like this would happen.
It is the medicine that is doing this.
I know it has helped thousands of people,
but the medicine is a critical component of whats going on.
It cannot be denied.
They figure if you can't prove it,
they can do anything they want.
They feel they have license and mandate to do this to people,
and they don't.
The whole thing is feeding on itself and spiraling out of control.
I am being enabled by the medicine.
I have performed an illegal operation and need to shut down.
That was silly.
That is never going to happen.
I just wanted to scare the shit out of them.
I want to be out from under the thumb of Henrico County Mental Health.
I want to be free to be who I am going to be.
If I am going to be the Antichrist,
let me be the Antichrist,
I am tired of this shit.
It will be finished over and done with.
Either way this aint happening again.
Stop hiding me and keeping me at bay.
Damnit let's roll.
If I don't win its over.
I am a nobody.
Wes is the one that deserves it.
The world has really shit on that guy.
I forgot why we started this shit.
This shit is about Wes.
He has been shit on and I am seeking some justice for the guy.
I would take a 10% cut.
That's okay.
90% of the universe didn't happen.
That's okay.
That was recon.
I know what to do now.
Wes is a better second.
He listens and does what I suggest.
Most schizos are so caught up in themselves,
they wont listen.
I guess I know that I don't know.
It must be a hideous secret.
They are feeding it to me slowly.
I flip out all the time.
They are afraid I will flip out.
Don't worry about me.
If that is the place that is meant for me I will be okay.
Its when you are in the place that isn't meant for you
that there is a problem.
Hell is for Satan's angels.
I don't know why they want to drag people down there.
Why don't they just take the place that is meant for them?
It is full of everything they ever wanted,
and they won't take it.
It is full of everything they ever wanted,
and they insist on taking The Garden of Eden
away from Adam and Eve.
I don't understand it.
It is a very special thing to have a place created for you.
I should not worry about it.
Who cares about blame?
Just take what he gives you and be happy with it.
Thursday, May 28
Mad Dog 20 20
"I have judged this man harshly"
was the last thing I heard.
I haven't heard anything since.
I don't think he thought I was still there.
I think he thought I was JJ.
I said some horrible things back in 97
that are not here for people to evaluate
I know apologizes are not enough
and I take full responsibility for what I said
I am sorry if it is not supposed to do that,
that is what it is doing.
Every article I ever read on the shit,
says it is as subtle as a horse tranquilizer.
I am here to get well.
I am not here to satisfy your curiosity.
You would not question a heart patient,
or a cancer patient,
if they complained about common side effects.
There is no freedom.
Where is freedom in America?
Try to speak your mind, and they use word verification on your ass.
When it comes to the Constitution,
we either mean it or we don't.
I guess "see ya" does not count.
Thank God he died.
I do not know what would have happened.
How can you get involved like that,
and then say "see ya".
Yall were playing psychological games with me.
I know I would have lost it anyway,
but it didn't feel that way back then.
Please, I am not Jesus.
They think I am Jesus.
They think I need to learn to help myself.
They are forcing him to make mistakes and it is not nice.
How can God trust me to do the right thing,
if I do things for my own selfish reasons?
Any little thing could set me off.
I don't know.
They equate me with Jesus.
They are trying to teach me the lessons
they are trying to teach him.
I asked the lord for the job.
If he wants to take it away from me so be it.
I am not jumping cars over this shit.
I need a job to keep me out of trouble.
It is in everybody's best interest that I have a job.
You said "see ya" and I freaked out.
I really wanted you in my life.
I knew without you was going to be really bad.
My guardian angel warned the Catholic Church before that happened.
Guardian angels know how to do that.
April the 3rd is forever going to be a very powerful one.
If I were nothing why would this matter to me?
I could say "this is silly" and move on.
The spirit wants something from me.
I can only hope to meet its expectations.
They believe in me enough,
they want me to stand up and fight you,
and I don't want to do that.
It would be sad to suffer this long
and waste it on a loosing proposition.
It is about this life
and what it means to me,
what I want people to remember.
For if they don't,
it is just going to repeat over and over again,
and that is the worst,
even if it isn't happening to me personally.
I wish I could go to the movies at 1:30
Jesus said it on the cross.
"It is finished."
It is just my story.
This is the way stories are told nowadays.
Too much easy living.
I can't formulate a paragraph,
much less a book.
We don't have to compete to get stuff out there.
Everybody is published.
They aren't burning the books,
they are burning the writers.
On 9-11 I said "I am not divine"
and that happened long before
I realized there was a conflict between the KJV and The Good News.
Can't you see?
It is about what a person can do and what they can't.
True Christians ARE walking twilight zones.
That's why we have the KJV to begin with.
It is Halloween candy.
It is Mad Dog 20 20.
It is not the real thing.
If it happened to you like it happened to me,
you would understand.
I am just the unlucky man who got caught in the conflict.
A conflict that started long before I was even born.
was the last thing I heard.
I haven't heard anything since.
I don't think he thought I was still there.
I think he thought I was JJ.
I said some horrible things back in 97
that are not here for people to evaluate
I know apologizes are not enough
and I take full responsibility for what I said
I am sorry if it is not supposed to do that,
that is what it is doing.
Every article I ever read on the shit,
says it is as subtle as a horse tranquilizer.
I am here to get well.
I am not here to satisfy your curiosity.
You would not question a heart patient,
or a cancer patient,
if they complained about common side effects.
There is no freedom.
Where is freedom in America?
Try to speak your mind, and they use word verification on your ass.
When it comes to the Constitution,
we either mean it or we don't.
I guess "see ya" does not count.
Thank God he died.
I do not know what would have happened.
How can you get involved like that,
and then say "see ya".
Yall were playing psychological games with me.
I know I would have lost it anyway,
but it didn't feel that way back then.
Please, I am not Jesus.
They think I am Jesus.
They think I need to learn to help myself.
They are forcing him to make mistakes and it is not nice.
How can God trust me to do the right thing,
if I do things for my own selfish reasons?
Any little thing could set me off.
I don't know.
They equate me with Jesus.
They are trying to teach me the lessons
they are trying to teach him.
I asked the lord for the job.
If he wants to take it away from me so be it.
I am not jumping cars over this shit.
I need a job to keep me out of trouble.
It is in everybody's best interest that I have a job.
You said "see ya" and I freaked out.
I really wanted you in my life.
I knew without you was going to be really bad.
My guardian angel warned the Catholic Church before that happened.
Guardian angels know how to do that.
April the 3rd is forever going to be a very powerful one.
If I were nothing why would this matter to me?
I could say "this is silly" and move on.
The spirit wants something from me.
I can only hope to meet its expectations.
They believe in me enough,
they want me to stand up and fight you,
and I don't want to do that.
It would be sad to suffer this long
and waste it on a loosing proposition.
It is about this life
and what it means to me,
what I want people to remember.
For if they don't,
it is just going to repeat over and over again,
and that is the worst,
even if it isn't happening to me personally.
I wish I could go to the movies at 1:30
Jesus said it on the cross.
"It is finished."
It is just my story.
This is the way stories are told nowadays.
Too much easy living.
I can't formulate a paragraph,
much less a book.
We don't have to compete to get stuff out there.
Everybody is published.
They aren't burning the books,
they are burning the writers.
On 9-11 I said "I am not divine"
and that happened long before
I realized there was a conflict between the KJV and The Good News.
Can't you see?
It is about what a person can do and what they can't.
True Christians ARE walking twilight zones.
That's why we have the KJV to begin with.
It is Halloween candy.
It is Mad Dog 20 20.
It is not the real thing.
If it happened to you like it happened to me,
you would understand.
I am just the unlucky man who got caught in the conflict.
A conflict that started long before I was even born.
Friday, May 22
Monday, May 18
The Lily White Alternative
That is what I have been trying to tell him.
There are people down there.
I am the only one who ever goes down there.
They think I am the only one that cares about them.
When things go south you go south.
I go south.
I consider it my job to go as far south as I can go.
I don't care if you don't care about them,
I care about them.
Ok they need to rock out.
I won't worry about them anymore.
That happened to me several years ago.
I thought you knew.
That happened back in 97.
I started wondering if it didn't happen
or did I just not remember it.
I take what people give me,
and turn it into weapons to vent my hostility.
In the wrong hands
these atypicals are like weapons grade plutonium.
I guess schizophrenics
are people who insist they remember everything.
When the doctor said I had quadrophrenia
I thought he knew I thought syphilis was an imaginary disease.
I came about that by thinking I might not remember everything.
I tried to claim the blog was just mine,
indicating Henry wasn't involved.
I meant it to be both of ours,
but he is hung up on copyrights and wouldn't contribute.
I told him no one reads those darn things,
but he won't listen.
He is hung up on copyrighting everything.
I don't know.
God is mad at him.
The computer wouldn't let me do it.
I don't think God thought David was here.
I think he thought David was purely JJ.
These are the times.
This is the way people communicate now.
What can I say?
He is a firm believer in the lily white alternative.
It is a struggle to be lily white,
and it shouldn't be ignored and ridiculed.
Nobody believes in the lily white alternative anymore.
They are itching for a fight.
They don't understand why I don't stand up and fight the asshole.
I am not God.
He can do things I cannot do.
I am sorry he is so political.
He is set firm and I don't want to get in a conflict.
If you don't want, need, or deserve a God,
Tell him yourself.
You think God is a crutch for weak minded fools.
I know you.
Now know yourself.
It is a rampant disaster.
If you are anthropic,
nothing happened until the sixth day.
Some quantity that must be produced for things to split like that?
For a universe to give off another universe
takes a certain amount of decision energy?
Decision energy is the idea
that if the many worlds interpretation is correct
there is enormous energy involved in our decisions.
Is it dark energy?
Because energy can neither be created or destroyed,
There would be an enormous amount of uncharacteristic energy
that could only be seen mathematically.
I agree,
it is dangerous for dreamers to fool around with this shit,
but maybe it needed to happen.
If God is mad at you, that is between you and God.
It is not my place to intercede on your behalf.
You have Jesus for that.
I am the beloved unlucky man.
That is all I am.
I feel for people who are living with lemons.
Even if it is their fault.
I didn't do it to pick a fight.
I had a frightening vision and got scared.
But the world does revolve around me.
I know that is offensive.
I wish it wasn't true.
I didn't always feel that way.
I guess that happens when you go this far south.
I am a victim of what I am studying.
The Sun doesn't create energy,
it releases energy.
Maybe I did
Maybe the time wave did not hit me.
If I do end up being the Antichrist,
There is a lot of people who really know me are going to be pissed.
Either way I won't have to do this again.
It isn't a light cone.
It is an event cone.
You cant be serious.
Lord what an idiot.
There are people down there.
I am the only one who ever goes down there.
They think I am the only one that cares about them.
When things go south you go south.
I go south.
I consider it my job to go as far south as I can go.
I don't care if you don't care about them,
I care about them.
Ok they need to rock out.
I won't worry about them anymore.
That happened to me several years ago.
I thought you knew.
That happened back in 97.
I started wondering if it didn't happen
or did I just not remember it.
I take what people give me,
and turn it into weapons to vent my hostility.
In the wrong hands
these atypicals are like weapons grade plutonium.
I guess schizophrenics
are people who insist they remember everything.
When the doctor said I had quadrophrenia
I thought he knew I thought syphilis was an imaginary disease.
I came about that by thinking I might not remember everything.
I tried to claim the blog was just mine,
indicating Henry wasn't involved.
I meant it to be both of ours,
but he is hung up on copyrights and wouldn't contribute.
I told him no one reads those darn things,
but he won't listen.
He is hung up on copyrighting everything.
I don't know.
God is mad at him.
The computer wouldn't let me do it.
I don't think God thought David was here.
I think he thought David was purely JJ.
These are the times.
This is the way people communicate now.
What can I say?
He is a firm believer in the lily white alternative.
It is a struggle to be lily white,
and it shouldn't be ignored and ridiculed.
Nobody believes in the lily white alternative anymore.
They are itching for a fight.
They don't understand why I don't stand up and fight the asshole.
I am not God.
He can do things I cannot do.
I am sorry he is so political.
He is set firm and I don't want to get in a conflict.
If you don't want, need, or deserve a God,
Tell him yourself.
You think God is a crutch for weak minded fools.
I know you.
Now know yourself.
It is a rampant disaster.
If you are anthropic,
nothing happened until the sixth day.
Some quantity that must be produced for things to split like that?
For a universe to give off another universe
takes a certain amount of decision energy?
Decision energy is the idea
that if the many worlds interpretation is correct
there is enormous energy involved in our decisions.
Is it dark energy?
Because energy can neither be created or destroyed,
There would be an enormous amount of uncharacteristic energy
that could only be seen mathematically.
I agree,
it is dangerous for dreamers to fool around with this shit,
but maybe it needed to happen.
If God is mad at you, that is between you and God.
It is not my place to intercede on your behalf.
You have Jesus for that.
I am the beloved unlucky man.
That is all I am.
I feel for people who are living with lemons.
Even if it is their fault.
I didn't do it to pick a fight.
I had a frightening vision and got scared.
But the world does revolve around me.
I know that is offensive.
I wish it wasn't true.
I didn't always feel that way.
I guess that happens when you go this far south.
I am a victim of what I am studying.
The Sun doesn't create energy,
it releases energy.
Maybe I did
Maybe the time wave did not hit me.
If I do end up being the Antichrist,
There is a lot of people who really know me are going to be pissed.
Either way I won't have to do this again.
It isn't a light cone.
It is an event cone.
You cant be serious.
Lord what an idiot.
Friday, May 8
The Strawberry Club
What motivates me?
I must really think I am somebody to get into this kind of trouble.
If every decision splits into a parallel universe,
What happens to the Sun?
What happens in Andromeda?
These are serious questions.
Anything that can happen has already happened,
and you really have to bust the odds for shit like that to happen.
It is like rouge waves,
It is real,
It happens.
There is a difference between what can take place,
what will take place,
and what must take place.
It is a power that makes hydrogen bombs look like tinker toys.
Quit on a holiday.
Years later it will be easier to remember what day you quit.
I don't like this new doctor.
This medicine lights me up like a Christmas tree,
and she is in complete denial about it.
Why is it automatically my fault?
She is the friggen doctor.
You want me off my damn meds?
God forbid something happen and I can't get my clozaril.
You will see what it is like without them.
you wont mistake me for not being on my meds anymore.
If I am off my meds you are going to friggen know it.
and its all yalls damn fault.
It is that friggen bad damn it
and you are in complete denial about it.
I told you what happened and you don't friggen believe me.
You are going to know it when I am off my meds.
Everybody is going to know it.
Pray that I can continue to get my medicine.
Pray really hard.
Here I am scared to death that I might miss my medicine,
and they don't think I am taking the damn shit.
I am a clozaril ghost.
jesus cant you friggen see that?
I am legitimately concerned about my medication
and yall think I am not taking it.
It is an insult.
Sometimes "why" feeds on itself and causes disasters.
I hope I am not the only one who learns that shit.
It aint going to be easy.
I aint going to let you have the satisfaction of it being easy with me.
I want us to learn something.
This shit is messy.
People's souls get wasted over this shit.
You are never going to understand it
in the manner you understand things.
The more decisions you make
the more you are able to make.
Decisions should open you up,
not narrow you down.
Wow,
I need to stop picking my nose.
In the middle of it all two pretty girls took me to the movies.
What more could a guy ask for?
I guess I am screwy.
They think I am in denial about being gay,
and that God is a figment of my imagination.
I say I was never given the opportunity
to make up my own mind about it.
No you don't understand assholes,
this ball started rolling in 1978.
I would much rather get caught up in a woman that doesn't love me,
than suck somebody's dick and take it up the ass.
Please forgive me
My sexuality is fucked up.
I don't know anything else.
I thought ten years was enough.
It is one thing to be obsessed with someone.
It is a whole other thing to think that person loves you.
It is a slippery slope.
I could have gotten in serious trouble.
I chose to play it safe.
I did not want to say goodbye,
I really thought she loved me.
I was on a slippery slope.
I chose to put the ball in her court.
I never though in a hundred years it would end up this way.
She got herself involved by keeping me on the air,
by having that conversation with me.
She remembers it.
I'm spotty.
There is shit happening that I don't remember.
The way her rules go,
I guess I am not supposed to put the ball in her court like that.
I am not big on rules.
I want her to take a risk.
I want her to show vulnerability.
The way her rules go,
She aint supposed to do that I guess.
It leads to a bad relationship.
I really thought she loved me.
I never thought this would happen in a hundred years.
I guess She believes in rules.
I guess She follows rules.
I don't.
I guess she thinks,
if we don't do it the right way,
it would lead to an abusive relationship.
Maybe she is right, I don't know.
Does she feel for me at all?
I am this way because it is safe.
It is safe to want someone you can't have.
I am not playing by the rules.
I don't know there are any rules.
Mother Nature doesn't listen.
Father Time doesn't care.
The question is...
Can we be under time reversal and not know it?
If everything has already happened,
it isn't an issue of changing anything,
it is an issue of moving from one to the other.
Like I said,
it is easier to do something you didn't do,
than to undo something you did.
Of course from her perspective,
I have already done it.
I may never know what I did that I didn't do,
but it has clearly happened.
They can't give me a B.
It is unfair to those that did their homework.
I don't know.
To me it seems there would be enormous energy in our decisions
that is just not there.
Its not like I had a credit card.
I would have had to go out of my way,
and I just don't remember it.
In fact it is something that I remember distinctly not doing.
Do I just not remember it,
or did it not happen?
This is a question that happens to a lot of people.
The result?
We couldn't be more separated if there were a brick wall.
Where does all that decision energy go?
Why don't we see it?
This is what happens to people like us.
We get stuck singing to each other.
Rule #12
Time travelers don't do their homework.
If he wants to do his homework,
who am I to tell him no?
Purposefully not doing something is an open door.
I don't know
we deal with odds of a billion to one all the time,
and we don't see decision energy.
At some point it throws a breaker
I don't know where it trips.
My advice?
If you don't want a wall between you and the people you love,
don't fool around with it.
It causes a blip on his radar.
It gets his attention.
Like something funky growing in the petri dish.
God is a reality some people don't want to wake up to.
They are having too much fun playing sick jokes on each other.
I guess my burning Revelation was a distress call.
It brought God into my life.
I know better than to take on God.
Responsibility is the worse thing that can happen to you.
You don't have to burn Revelation.
If you are in distress,
put a loaf of bread in the microwave.
Everyone needs a distress call.
Even Pookie bites my toes when I forget to feed him.
A fight broke out
and someone knocked me over the head with a chair.
I must really think I am somebody to get into this kind of trouble.
If every decision splits into a parallel universe,
What happens to the Sun?
What happens in Andromeda?
These are serious questions.
Anything that can happen has already happened,
and you really have to bust the odds for shit like that to happen.
It is like rouge waves,
It is real,
It happens.
There is a difference between what can take place,
what will take place,
and what must take place.
It is a power that makes hydrogen bombs look like tinker toys.
Quit on a holiday.
Years later it will be easier to remember what day you quit.
I don't like this new doctor.
This medicine lights me up like a Christmas tree,
and she is in complete denial about it.
Why is it automatically my fault?
She is the friggen doctor.
You want me off my damn meds?
God forbid something happen and I can't get my clozaril.
You will see what it is like without them.
you wont mistake me for not being on my meds anymore.
If I am off my meds you are going to friggen know it.
and its all yalls damn fault.
It is that friggen bad damn it
and you are in complete denial about it.
I told you what happened and you don't friggen believe me.
You are going to know it when I am off my meds.
Everybody is going to know it.
Pray that I can continue to get my medicine.
Pray really hard.
Here I am scared to death that I might miss my medicine,
and they don't think I am taking the damn shit.
I am a clozaril ghost.
jesus cant you friggen see that?
I am legitimately concerned about my medication
and yall think I am not taking it.
It is an insult.
Sometimes "why" feeds on itself and causes disasters.
I hope I am not the only one who learns that shit.
It aint going to be easy.
I aint going to let you have the satisfaction of it being easy with me.
I want us to learn something.
This shit is messy.
People's souls get wasted over this shit.
You are never going to understand it
in the manner you understand things.
The more decisions you make
the more you are able to make.
Decisions should open you up,
not narrow you down.
Wow,
I need to stop picking my nose.
In the middle of it all two pretty girls took me to the movies.
What more could a guy ask for?
I guess I am screwy.
They think I am in denial about being gay,
and that God is a figment of my imagination.
I say I was never given the opportunity
to make up my own mind about it.
No you don't understand assholes,
this ball started rolling in 1978.
I would much rather get caught up in a woman that doesn't love me,
than suck somebody's dick and take it up the ass.
Please forgive me
My sexuality is fucked up.
I don't know anything else.
I thought ten years was enough.
It is one thing to be obsessed with someone.
It is a whole other thing to think that person loves you.
It is a slippery slope.
I could have gotten in serious trouble.
I chose to play it safe.
I did not want to say goodbye,
I really thought she loved me.
I was on a slippery slope.
I chose to put the ball in her court.
I never though in a hundred years it would end up this way.
She got herself involved by keeping me on the air,
by having that conversation with me.
She remembers it.
I'm spotty.
There is shit happening that I don't remember.
The way her rules go,
I guess I am not supposed to put the ball in her court like that.
I am not big on rules.
I want her to take a risk.
I want her to show vulnerability.
The way her rules go,
She aint supposed to do that I guess.
It leads to a bad relationship.
I really thought she loved me.
I never thought this would happen in a hundred years.
I guess She believes in rules.
I guess She follows rules.
I don't.
I guess she thinks,
if we don't do it the right way,
it would lead to an abusive relationship.
Maybe she is right, I don't know.
Does she feel for me at all?
I am this way because it is safe.
It is safe to want someone you can't have.
I am not playing by the rules.
I don't know there are any rules.
Mother Nature doesn't listen.
Father Time doesn't care.
The question is...
Can we be under time reversal and not know it?
If everything has already happened,
it isn't an issue of changing anything,
it is an issue of moving from one to the other.
Like I said,
it is easier to do something you didn't do,
than to undo something you did.
Of course from her perspective,
I have already done it.
I may never know what I did that I didn't do,
but it has clearly happened.
They can't give me a B.
It is unfair to those that did their homework.
I don't know.
To me it seems there would be enormous energy in our decisions
that is just not there.
Its not like I had a credit card.
I would have had to go out of my way,
and I just don't remember it.
In fact it is something that I remember distinctly not doing.
Do I just not remember it,
or did it not happen?
This is a question that happens to a lot of people.
The result?
We couldn't be more separated if there were a brick wall.
Where does all that decision energy go?
Why don't we see it?
This is what happens to people like us.
We get stuck singing to each other.
Rule #12
Time travelers don't do their homework.
If he wants to do his homework,
who am I to tell him no?
Purposefully not doing something is an open door.
I don't know
we deal with odds of a billion to one all the time,
and we don't see decision energy.
At some point it throws a breaker
I don't know where it trips.
My advice?
If you don't want a wall between you and the people you love,
don't fool around with it.
It causes a blip on his radar.
It gets his attention.
Like something funky growing in the petri dish.
God is a reality some people don't want to wake up to.
They are having too much fun playing sick jokes on each other.
I guess my burning Revelation was a distress call.
It brought God into my life.
I know better than to take on God.
Responsibility is the worse thing that can happen to you.
You don't have to burn Revelation.
If you are in distress,
put a loaf of bread in the microwave.
Everyone needs a distress call.
Even Pookie bites my toes when I forget to feed him.
A fight broke out
and someone knocked me over the head with a chair.
Sunday, April 26
We need God because...
I don't feel so bad.
Some hobo invented the blues 100 years ago,
and nobody knows who he was.
I am just a little kid,
digging up roots,
building a bypass around a tree,
I don't know what I am doing.
This is beyond cause.
I have turned the other check several times.
This shit needs to stop.
This shit could be settled right now.
Whatever transpires now is beyond cause.
It means you are shoving somebody who is out of bounds.
I was stupid to think hangups would amount to anything.
She is too guarded. I wanted her to open up.
Word verification caused time reversal
and I had a natural reaction to it.
Mathematical activity calms the sun down?
Uncertainty is good for the sun?
She deserves more.
I wish I could give it to her.
Ronnie really messed her up.
She has probably been through hell just being my sister.
I don't care what happens to me.
I just want average people to not have to deal with this shit.
I just don't want other people to go through what I went through.
Satan is an asshole.
This shit is about my sister.
It has always been about my sister.
This shit started long before I even met Ginger.
The only thing I can do is put others first and not worry about me.
Because he knows what Satan does.
He knows how Satan operates.
He knows it is only a matter of time before this scenario takes place.
He gets you to make decisions that are his friggen decision.
He knows this shit is in Satan's bag of tricks.
He knows its in his friggen playbook.
He predicted it 2000 friggen years ago.
Am I asking anyone to make decisions that are my friggen decision?
I have already made my decision.
I made it on September 11, 2001!
Some Bibles say divine,
Some Bibles don't people.
God forbid you have to stray away from the friggen KJV.
Its a decision you have to make.
I already made mine.
Just because it has been around for hundreds of years,
and it hasn't steered anyone wrong,
doesn't make it right.
What are the needs of superlatives?
They just don't belong.
Even Sir Elton needs help writing his songs.
I want to ensure people have decisions to make.
I don't like this making decisions that are his decision crap.
I burnt Revelation and I had a horrible day dream.
It was never anything more than that.
I know they don't like it,
but damnit they are just a daydream to me.
They got upset that earth didn't go through harsh cycles like they did,
and they decided to attack the training program
that earth ran at the beginning of each cycle.
I stole Adam, and used the Hopi to keep hell busy
while we solved the problem,
but it was all a horrible daydream
it wasn't real.
It gets too political for me.
Mother Nature doesn't listen
Father Time doesn't care.
It was a bad design.
There is no need to argue and fight.
There is plenty fish for everyone.
I don't know why it takes ten years for people to listen to me.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
We need God because Mother Nature doesn't listen,
and Father Time doesn't care.
Some hobo invented the blues 100 years ago,
and nobody knows who he was.
I am just a little kid,
digging up roots,
building a bypass around a tree,
I don't know what I am doing.
This is beyond cause.
I have turned the other check several times.
This shit needs to stop.
This shit could be settled right now.
Whatever transpires now is beyond cause.
It means you are shoving somebody who is out of bounds.
I was stupid to think hangups would amount to anything.
She is too guarded. I wanted her to open up.
Word verification caused time reversal
and I had a natural reaction to it.
Mathematical activity calms the sun down?
Uncertainty is good for the sun?
She deserves more.
I wish I could give it to her.
Ronnie really messed her up.
She has probably been through hell just being my sister.
I don't care what happens to me.
I just want average people to not have to deal with this shit.
I just don't want other people to go through what I went through.
Satan is an asshole.
This shit is about my sister.
It has always been about my sister.
This shit started long before I even met Ginger.
The only thing I can do is put others first and not worry about me.
Because he knows what Satan does.
He knows how Satan operates.
He knows it is only a matter of time before this scenario takes place.
He gets you to make decisions that are his friggen decision.
He knows this shit is in Satan's bag of tricks.
He knows its in his friggen playbook.
He predicted it 2000 friggen years ago.
Am I asking anyone to make decisions that are my friggen decision?
I have already made my decision.
I made it on September 11, 2001!
Some Bibles say divine,
Some Bibles don't people.
God forbid you have to stray away from the friggen KJV.
Its a decision you have to make.
I already made mine.
Just because it has been around for hundreds of years,
and it hasn't steered anyone wrong,
doesn't make it right.
What are the needs of superlatives?
They just don't belong.
Even Sir Elton needs help writing his songs.
I want to ensure people have decisions to make.
I don't like this making decisions that are his decision crap.
I burnt Revelation and I had a horrible day dream.
It was never anything more than that.
I know they don't like it,
but damnit they are just a daydream to me.
They got upset that earth didn't go through harsh cycles like they did,
and they decided to attack the training program
that earth ran at the beginning of each cycle.
I stole Adam, and used the Hopi to keep hell busy
while we solved the problem,
but it was all a horrible daydream
it wasn't real.
It gets too political for me.
Mother Nature doesn't listen
Father Time doesn't care.
It was a bad design.
There is no need to argue and fight.
There is plenty fish for everyone.
I don't know why it takes ten years for people to listen to me.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
We need God because Mother Nature doesn't listen,
and Father Time doesn't care.
Thursday, April 2
I felt encouraged
I felt encouraged to make something,
and nothing ever came of it.
It is all upside down and backwards.
I couldn't have Blue Lagoon with a woman,
so I had Blue Lagoon with my music.
I don't think anyone understands that shit.
I know it is crazy.
I know you can't live that way.
It is my driving compulsion.
I want things first hand,
or as if as I can get.
I understand the need for the scientific method,
but it caused brinksmanship.
It is important to know if it is a natural universe or not,
I agree with you,
but the only proof is what you are capable of.
It was a natural reaction to time reversal.
I can see where things would build to the point
someone would claim to be God.
Living forever is touching so many lives
your life review never ends.
For me, it is easier to let go of the right than the left.
If you cant get both hands going,
get a small keyboard and flip it over.
it doesn't have to stay like that.
once you get things going
hopefully you can flip it back.
If I want to be a musician,
I am going to have to let go.
I don't think anyone would bitch if I got a few million.
I took care of something that was a real problem.
I just hope when they find out what truly transpired,
they will forgive me for it.
I told them to name their worlds and move on.
That is why everyone is so pissed off at ill annoy.
Somebody came upon the policy of annoying the mentally ill.
It can't be stopped.
We would have to unplug every radio station in the country.
Is it true?
Do they really do this?
What are they trying to accomplish?
We are all not Mark David Chapman
We are all not John Hinkley
You should be glad I am in this spot.
No wonder shit is evaporating.
That was a big update.
Something must have gone down.
You always hear everybody,
oh they knew about 9-11
or they knew about pearl harbor
but you don't hear about the ones that were prevented.
It is a constant struggle
to be one step behind everyone else.
The lottery is the easy way out.
Make the money work.
The way I remember it,
I said I wasn't going to play
if people were going to argue about it.
An unidentified parameter remains unidentified.
The idea that you can solve X is arcane and outmoded.
Some things are going to remain unidentified,
and you don't have to fool with it anyway.
and nothing ever came of it.
It is all upside down and backwards.
I couldn't have Blue Lagoon with a woman,
so I had Blue Lagoon with my music.
I don't think anyone understands that shit.
I know it is crazy.
I know you can't live that way.
It is my driving compulsion.
I want things first hand,
or as if as I can get.
I understand the need for the scientific method,
but it caused brinksmanship.
It is important to know if it is a natural universe or not,
I agree with you,
but the only proof is what you are capable of.
It was a natural reaction to time reversal.
I can see where things would build to the point
someone would claim to be God.
Living forever is touching so many lives
your life review never ends.
For me, it is easier to let go of the right than the left.
If you cant get both hands going,
get a small keyboard and flip it over.
it doesn't have to stay like that.
once you get things going
hopefully you can flip it back.
If I want to be a musician,
I am going to have to let go.
I don't think anyone would bitch if I got a few million.
I took care of something that was a real problem.
I just hope when they find out what truly transpired,
they will forgive me for it.
I told them to name their worlds and move on.
That is why everyone is so pissed off at ill annoy.
Somebody came upon the policy of annoying the mentally ill.
It can't be stopped.
We would have to unplug every radio station in the country.
Is it true?
Do they really do this?
What are they trying to accomplish?
We are all not Mark David Chapman
We are all not John Hinkley
You should be glad I am in this spot.
No wonder shit is evaporating.
That was a big update.
Something must have gone down.
You always hear everybody,
oh they knew about 9-11
or they knew about pearl harbor
but you don't hear about the ones that were prevented.
It is a constant struggle
to be one step behind everyone else.
The lottery is the easy way out.
Make the money work.
The way I remember it,
I said I wasn't going to play
if people were going to argue about it.
An unidentified parameter remains unidentified.
The idea that you can solve X is arcane and outmoded.
Some things are going to remain unidentified,
and you don't have to fool with it anyway.
Thursday, March 26
Where the uncertainty is
You need to chase lemons.
You need to tie knots.
You need to bust the game.
That shit belongs on the other side of the river.
You got to cross the bridge before you get into that shit.
I wouldn't say I was blameless,
but the codec is the main thing that happened to her.
Why do I worry about the real world?
Nobody else does.
In fact they seem to be in a head long rush to do away with it.
They just say mine is different from everyone else's.
They say I steal worlds and stitch them to the bang.
It is like setting your watch.
Isn't that what you are supposed to do?
If it is to be mastered, they will master it.
They will go on and off bang at will.
I am trying to explain it to you.
It is a natural reaction to time reversal.
You gotta make sure time is going in the right direction.
It is called "off the bang"
because the arrow of history doesn't point to the bang.
When it does point to the bang it is called "on the bang"
The alternate realities should already be there,
you shouldn't have to create them.
All you have to do is go on and off the bang.
It is probably better to go through the dark rift on the bang.
That way we would put the whole milky way on the bang.
It would be good for us,
but I can't say what effect it would have on everyone else.
If there is anyone else.
"Make the future, or let someone else make it for you."
There is potential for great struggle,
whether we are going through the dark rift on or off the bang.
As you can imagine.
off the bang is an enormous industry.
Jesus already won.
You are either going to go through it grounded,
or you are going to end up grounded.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
You have a right for a heads up to what this shit is about.
You have the right to make choices.
This is recourse
for the wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read agenda.
It is all about where the uncertainty is.
If the dark rift does have psychiatric effects,
lay on the ground or sleep on the floor.
It is all about where the uncertainty is.
Sometimes it is ahead of you.
Sometimes it is behind you.
Sometimes you are in the middle of it.
I wish we could have gone to Disneyworld together.
You need to tie knots.
You need to bust the game.
That shit belongs on the other side of the river.
You got to cross the bridge before you get into that shit.
I wouldn't say I was blameless,
but the codec is the main thing that happened to her.
Why do I worry about the real world?
Nobody else does.
In fact they seem to be in a head long rush to do away with it.
They just say mine is different from everyone else's.
They say I steal worlds and stitch them to the bang.
It is like setting your watch.
Isn't that what you are supposed to do?
If it is to be mastered, they will master it.
They will go on and off bang at will.
I am trying to explain it to you.
It is a natural reaction to time reversal.
You gotta make sure time is going in the right direction.
It is called "off the bang"
because the arrow of history doesn't point to the bang.
When it does point to the bang it is called "on the bang"
The alternate realities should already be there,
you shouldn't have to create them.
All you have to do is go on and off the bang.
It is probably better to go through the dark rift on the bang.
That way we would put the whole milky way on the bang.
It would be good for us,
but I can't say what effect it would have on everyone else.
If there is anyone else.
"Make the future, or let someone else make it for you."
There is potential for great struggle,
whether we are going through the dark rift on or off the bang.
As you can imagine.
off the bang is an enormous industry.
Jesus already won.
You are either going to go through it grounded,
or you are going to end up grounded.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
You have a right for a heads up to what this shit is about.
You have the right to make choices.
This is recourse
for the wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read agenda.
It is all about where the uncertainty is.
If the dark rift does have psychiatric effects,
lay on the ground or sleep on the floor.
It is all about where the uncertainty is.
Sometimes it is ahead of you.
Sometimes it is behind you.
Sometimes you are in the middle of it.
I wish we could have gone to Disneyworld together.
Wednesday, March 18
The Dark Rift
If I was doing my best and working for one dollar,
and they drug me before congress,
I'd tell them to go screw themselves.
These are retention bonuses people.
These are groups that AIG is shutting down.
The only money these people are working for practically is the bonus.
How else are they going to retain people
in positions that are to be eliminated shortly?
Market capitalism works on the job market too.
I wouldn't tolerate this crap.
I come out of retirement,
and for the sake of my country
take a job and a 1$ to do it,
and now they are talking about criminal attorneys.
This is why the government shouldn't run companies.
People worry too much about other people's opinions.
Let them get angry.
Let them laugh at you.
I am insensitive.
All I think about is myself.
They know the government is messing with me,
so they are messing with the government.
I think people underestimate what an IQ of 60 is capable of.
My opinion?
I think they let it happen to find out who our friends are.
If this happened first,
that is the only thing that makes sense.
The teacher knew what she had.
It should have gotten me a scholarship.
They let me get away.
God enjoys watching me fight to stay on.
It is one of his favorite movies.
It is confusing.
I hear people say shit that they don't recollect.
Virginia decided to go east and west a long time ago.
I wouldn't say there were bigger issues involved,
but there were other issues.
People just don't talk about it.
You have one guy that talks about it,
and that is me.
Well maybe T.S. Elliot I don't know.
I think I need to go back and read that shit.
I am sorry I landed him in the hospital.
He said my family name was an acronym,
and I don't like that crap.
I like him.
He is a good guy.
He just suffers from a game mentality.
98% of everybody does nowadays,
so I cant really blame him.
Yes I landed a Cohen in the hospital,
so keep that in mind.
Yall were all backwards,
stuck doing 6's,
dumber than a cockroach.
Yall aint gonna make it through the dark rift that way.
Even if it is not an obstacle,
It is good to think of it as one.
And if it is,
It is there for a reason.
People who don't make honor flight
understand basic training is not a game that you win.
They carried me through when I didn't deserve to be,
and I will never forget that.
People say I skated because of my father.
No it is more than that people.
Sometimes your enemies become your best friends.
I never met anyone from Boston that liked me very much.
There are plenty of people with fathers bigger than mine
who didn't skate.
People want to make this about George Mallory and it's not.
Who really cares?
Who is willing to try?
To save a world that is destined to die?
You know who said it.
Everyone should know who said that.
and I was an Airman just like him.
And you want me to be like David Lee Roth.
It is pathetic.
You don't get put on the bottom bunk
and carried through because of your father.
I know it was wrong.
I will admit it was wrong.
They just didn't let me get away like everyone else did.
What did I know?
I was a pink ass floozie.
I had to get out cause I knew I was a pink ass floozie,
and if I had it to do over again,
I wouldn't be a pink ass floozie anymore.
You are still hung up on what you are in.
I told you we are not in the darn thing.
Just line yourself up.
There is plenty of them.
Is he really?
I'll do anything I can.
and they drug me before congress,
I'd tell them to go screw themselves.
These are retention bonuses people.
These are groups that AIG is shutting down.
The only money these people are working for practically is the bonus.
How else are they going to retain people
in positions that are to be eliminated shortly?
Market capitalism works on the job market too.
I wouldn't tolerate this crap.
I come out of retirement,
and for the sake of my country
take a job and a 1$ to do it,
and now they are talking about criminal attorneys.
This is why the government shouldn't run companies.
People worry too much about other people's opinions.
Let them get angry.
Let them laugh at you.
I am insensitive.
All I think about is myself.
They know the government is messing with me,
so they are messing with the government.
I think people underestimate what an IQ of 60 is capable of.
My opinion?
I think they let it happen to find out who our friends are.
If this happened first,
that is the only thing that makes sense.
The teacher knew what she had.
It should have gotten me a scholarship.
They let me get away.
God enjoys watching me fight to stay on.
It is one of his favorite movies.
It is confusing.
I hear people say shit that they don't recollect.
Virginia decided to go east and west a long time ago.
I wouldn't say there were bigger issues involved,
but there were other issues.
People just don't talk about it.
You have one guy that talks about it,
and that is me.
Well maybe T.S. Elliot I don't know.
I think I need to go back and read that shit.
I am sorry I landed him in the hospital.
He said my family name was an acronym,
and I don't like that crap.
I like him.
He is a good guy.
He just suffers from a game mentality.
98% of everybody does nowadays,
so I cant really blame him.
Yes I landed a Cohen in the hospital,
so keep that in mind.
Yall were all backwards,
stuck doing 6's,
dumber than a cockroach.
Yall aint gonna make it through the dark rift that way.
Even if it is not an obstacle,
It is good to think of it as one.
And if it is,
It is there for a reason.
People who don't make honor flight
understand basic training is not a game that you win.
They carried me through when I didn't deserve to be,
and I will never forget that.
People say I skated because of my father.
No it is more than that people.
Sometimes your enemies become your best friends.
I never met anyone from Boston that liked me very much.
There are plenty of people with fathers bigger than mine
who didn't skate.
People want to make this about George Mallory and it's not.
Who really cares?
Who is willing to try?
To save a world that is destined to die?
You know who said it.
Everyone should know who said that.
and I was an Airman just like him.
And you want me to be like David Lee Roth.
It is pathetic.
You don't get put on the bottom bunk
and carried through because of your father.
I know it was wrong.
I will admit it was wrong.
They just didn't let me get away like everyone else did.
What did I know?
I was a pink ass floozie.
I had to get out cause I knew I was a pink ass floozie,
and if I had it to do over again,
I wouldn't be a pink ass floozie anymore.
You are still hung up on what you are in.
I told you we are not in the darn thing.
Just line yourself up.
There is plenty of them.
Is he really?
I'll do anything I can.
Wednesday, March 11
I am the wimper
I used the same method to generate a list of prime numbers.
I didn't realize I was doing such important stuff.
God I probably could of got a scholarship to MIT for that.
I set up flags for the basic rules
then set up an array for the rest.
You have my permission to do wendy's
How was I supposed to know I was outdoing MIT?
I was just fiddling around.
I didn't know.
I have no idea where that shit is now.
that was in 88.
Is there any doubt it is me?
What am I supposed to do?
please lets have a reunion
I am sorry I am a fuckup
Both of you have so much strength, confidence, and motivation.
I am creative, but I lack those things.
I guess I wanted her to take me under her wing,
and take me places.
I knew she was going somewhere, and I wanted to tag along.
I didn't like radio.
It made me nervous.
I had to get away from it.
I never had any radio ambition.
I took the course cause they black balled me from the stage.
I didn't expect the mike fright and the paranoia.
I didn't enjoy it.
I am a writer.
Anyone who can get clear backwards phrases like that is a writer.
I guess this is what we are nowadays.
I am the wimper.
It just wasn't a good time.
I was barely hanging on to my identity.
I needed a break.
I shouldn't have said goodbye.
That was cruel and mean.
I guess Mr Harris was right about some things.
I don't know why I was so hard headed.
I just didn't like the world I was living in,
and everyone was telling me there was nothing I could do about it.
It ends where it started,
because I hadn't decided where it was supposed to end yet.
It is space for things to happen in,
just like the internet.
I got struck by the internet back in 85.
I don't think we fully appreciate the internet yet.
Things are never going to be the same.
Somebody made a post,
I wrote a program,
the rest is history.
I don't know about 2012.
Hopefully I have gone south enough early enough.
They might be right
about not wanting to go through the alignment like that.
The center is something we share with the rest of the galaxy.
There might be galactic chaos.
I didn't realize I was doing such important stuff.
God I probably could of got a scholarship to MIT for that.
I set up flags for the basic rules
then set up an array for the rest.
You have my permission to do wendy's
How was I supposed to know I was outdoing MIT?
I was just fiddling around.
I didn't know.
I have no idea where that shit is now.
that was in 88.
Is there any doubt it is me?
What am I supposed to do?
please lets have a reunion
I am sorry I am a fuckup
Both of you have so much strength, confidence, and motivation.
I am creative, but I lack those things.
I guess I wanted her to take me under her wing,
and take me places.
I knew she was going somewhere, and I wanted to tag along.
I didn't like radio.
It made me nervous.
I had to get away from it.
I never had any radio ambition.
I took the course cause they black balled me from the stage.
I didn't expect the mike fright and the paranoia.
I didn't enjoy it.
I am a writer.
Anyone who can get clear backwards phrases like that is a writer.
I guess this is what we are nowadays.
I am the wimper.
It just wasn't a good time.
I was barely hanging on to my identity.
I needed a break.
I shouldn't have said goodbye.
That was cruel and mean.
I guess Mr Harris was right about some things.
I don't know why I was so hard headed.
I just didn't like the world I was living in,
and everyone was telling me there was nothing I could do about it.
It ends where it started,
because I hadn't decided where it was supposed to end yet.
It is space for things to happen in,
just like the internet.
I got struck by the internet back in 85.
I don't think we fully appreciate the internet yet.
Things are never going to be the same.
Somebody made a post,
I wrote a program,
the rest is history.
I don't know about 2012.
Hopefully I have gone south enough early enough.
They might be right
about not wanting to go through the alignment like that.
The center is something we share with the rest of the galaxy.
There might be galactic chaos.
Tuesday, March 3
this dog dont hunt
I am not a sexual predator.
I don't know how to be one.
I wouldn't want to be one anyway.
I couldn't fill that role if I tried.
Does that mean I had a bad mother?
I didn't know this was a friggen mountain.
I thought I was free to have it the way I wanted it.
Everyone wants to make my mother out to be the antichrist.
When it comes to mapping and polarization,
damn right I am going to be obstructionist.
You say too often I am the problem.
You say this needs to be done.
but its not my fault you are living with lemons.
I don't care if it needed to be done or not.
They were messing with me and they know it.
I have been through the gauntlet.
I don't have the energy to deal with this crap anymore.
Y2K happened sweetheart.
Us breaking up is a big deal to them.
I cant stay here much longer.
I am scaring the living crap out of everybody.
I don't remember what I wrote.
It is probably secret anyway.
The effect is it calls itself,
but it doesn't really do that.
it flags everything else
and the "subroutine" is actually the default.
I solved the problem by turning it upside down,
I always do.
The subroutine is never actually called.
I took advantage of the fact that the program keeps running.
Basically you bury it at the bottom of a bunch of flags.
Nobody steeped in standard architecture would ever think of that.
It is called "doing a wendy's"
I decided to put the ball in her court.
I don't even know what I have given up for my country,
and people think I am kidding around.
Every one trying to fix me
and it aint god damn broke.
Like I said,
the Marines know how to do this shit now.
I don't have to worry about it anymore.
What is the problem?
The problem is she is a siren,
and she doesn't even know it.
She thinks she is doing things by the book,
the right way,
but she is a siren,
and you know what?
98% of them are nowadays.
Men that have a mission,
men that want to accomplish something,
they just can't compete anymore.
We are sexual animals.
We have no mind of our own.
We are not even real.
God loves me.
Deal with it.
They want it,
and they can't have it,
and no amount of trying is ever going to give it to them.
I didn't even read the darn thing until it was friggen over.
It has to be written in your heart.
Yes sweetheart for me Y2K happened in 1985.
I am trying to tell you but you think I'm delusional and wacko.
As far as I am concerned,
If they didn't want someone to solve it,
they shouldn't have made the post.
I am sorry that is the way things work.
They are arguing who has the right to do what.
I understand it is a big issue.
If we are going to have recourse,
that is the way things work.
Monday chases lemons
that is just the way it goes.
Satan says it is going to stop.
Satan says it is going to break somewhere.
I don't want to get in the argument.
I didn't realize I wrote the holy grail for Christ's sake.
If they didn't want it solved they shouldn't have posted it.
The internet is a big place
for anything that can happen will happen.
Cause I believe Paul
and if that actually did happen I am sorry.
I don't know how to be one.
I wouldn't want to be one anyway.
I couldn't fill that role if I tried.
Does that mean I had a bad mother?
I didn't know this was a friggen mountain.
I thought I was free to have it the way I wanted it.
Everyone wants to make my mother out to be the antichrist.
When it comes to mapping and polarization,
damn right I am going to be obstructionist.
You say too often I am the problem.
You say this needs to be done.
but its not my fault you are living with lemons.
I don't care if it needed to be done or not.
They were messing with me and they know it.
I have been through the gauntlet.
I don't have the energy to deal with this crap anymore.
Y2K happened sweetheart.
Us breaking up is a big deal to them.
I cant stay here much longer.
I am scaring the living crap out of everybody.
I don't remember what I wrote.
It is probably secret anyway.
The effect is it calls itself,
but it doesn't really do that.
it flags everything else
and the "subroutine" is actually the default.
I solved the problem by turning it upside down,
I always do.
The subroutine is never actually called.
I took advantage of the fact that the program keeps running.
Basically you bury it at the bottom of a bunch of flags.
Nobody steeped in standard architecture would ever think of that.
It is called "doing a wendy's"
I decided to put the ball in her court.
I don't even know what I have given up for my country,
and people think I am kidding around.
Every one trying to fix me
and it aint god damn broke.
Like I said,
the Marines know how to do this shit now.
I don't have to worry about it anymore.
What is the problem?
The problem is she is a siren,
and she doesn't even know it.
She thinks she is doing things by the book,
the right way,
but she is a siren,
and you know what?
98% of them are nowadays.
Men that have a mission,
men that want to accomplish something,
they just can't compete anymore.
We are sexual animals.
We have no mind of our own.
We are not even real.
God loves me.
Deal with it.
They want it,
and they can't have it,
and no amount of trying is ever going to give it to them.
I didn't even read the darn thing until it was friggen over.
It has to be written in your heart.
Yes sweetheart for me Y2K happened in 1985.
I am trying to tell you but you think I'm delusional and wacko.
As far as I am concerned,
If they didn't want someone to solve it,
they shouldn't have made the post.
I am sorry that is the way things work.
They are arguing who has the right to do what.
I understand it is a big issue.
If we are going to have recourse,
that is the way things work.
Monday chases lemons
that is just the way it goes.
Satan says it is going to stop.
Satan says it is going to break somewhere.
I don't want to get in the argument.
I didn't realize I wrote the holy grail for Christ's sake.
If they didn't want it solved they shouldn't have posted it.
The internet is a big place
for anything that can happen will happen.
Cause I believe Paul
and if that actually did happen I am sorry.
Wednesday, February 25
whatever it was...
whatever it was
it started on October 1 2008
and ended February 15 2009
something happened on the 15th.
I wish I could wear the uniform again.
I would go to Iraq in a heartbeat.
The only proof I have is what I am capable of.
I don't think this is going to be resolved without conflict.
Moving around in four dimensions does something.
Its an actualization.
I know you think there is no such thing as the real world.
I know you think men that do this are angry at women.
but it has moved beyond that now.
The only proof I have is what I am capable of.
Can brinkmanship cease for a moment?
Maybe I am angry at women
but that doesn't change anything.
I have still done something unallowed.
I praise her.
She could of got me kicked out the program,
but she didn't.
I probably wouldn't have graduated without them.
A program crashes when it does something unallowed.
I am free to do all sorts of unallowed stuff.
It is not just Dave's little world.
Dave has done something unallowed.
Ok I admit it
I have anger and resentment towards women.
I don't know how this shit started.
I just feel like everyone is lying to me.
I have performed an illegal operation.
I need to shut down.
Thou shall not suffer a witch to live.
I don't blame my mother.
I blame the dish detergent and the Clorox.
They have a good 2009
and they don't want me to shut down.
God forbid it be the dish detergent and the Clorox.
Somebody is getting something out of this.
I have performed an illegal operation.
I need to shut down.
They are Newtonian.
They don't understand what I am trying to tell them.
Cause and effect can get mixed up on this medicine,
but they won't listen to me.
What can I do?
I know what it is doing to me,
but they are forcing me to take it.
and I am never going to successfully sue Google.
All I have is this damn blog.
Future generations are going to know who was responsible for this.
Now they want to blame Actifed.
I am sorry.
Cause and effect has gotten screwed up with me.
I have had a fatal error.
I just don't recall anything,
God damn it!
I had all sorts of girl friends.
Then I met her and everything went to hell.
I don't have to do it anymore if I don't want to,
and I like it that way.
I don't know where I got this attitude about sex.
I don't know what I am supposed to do about it.
Other singularities don't go bang.
What made the big bang singularity go bang?
A singularity went bang somewhere people.
There are billions of them and nobody knows why one went bang.
I know people specialize and can't know everything,
but I talk to them about the big bang,
and they are like "Is that a good explosion or a bad explosion."
They have gotten a little ahead of themselves.
They think the world exists inside a woman's heart.
They think sex holds the world together.
They think men created the stars to entertain themselves.
They think men are superimposed.
I am telling you, they are nuts.
They think men that do this are angry at women.
They are going to see me that way forever,
whether I am right or wrong.
There is nothing I can say or do to change their mind.
If you understood better what it is supposed to be used for
you might have a different opinion.
I have freed my mind.
I was backwards.
I am on the other side of that mess now.
If that is being angry at women so be it.
My life has split into before and after.
She was only the third girl I ever asked out.
I knew that summer
if she got away from me it would be a disaster.
I didn't know it was a mountain.
I don't mean to hurt women.
I don't mean to make them cry.
I just don't buy into the same shit everyone else does.
I keep losing them forever and it hurts.
it started on October 1 2008
and ended February 15 2009
something happened on the 15th.
I wish I could wear the uniform again.
I would go to Iraq in a heartbeat.
The only proof I have is what I am capable of.
I don't think this is going to be resolved without conflict.
Moving around in four dimensions does something.
Its an actualization.
I know you think there is no such thing as the real world.
I know you think men that do this are angry at women.
but it has moved beyond that now.
The only proof I have is what I am capable of.
Can brinkmanship cease for a moment?
Maybe I am angry at women
but that doesn't change anything.
I have still done something unallowed.
I praise her.
She could of got me kicked out the program,
but she didn't.
I probably wouldn't have graduated without them.
A program crashes when it does something unallowed.
I am free to do all sorts of unallowed stuff.
It is not just Dave's little world.
Dave has done something unallowed.
Ok I admit it
I have anger and resentment towards women.
I don't know how this shit started.
I just feel like everyone is lying to me.
I have performed an illegal operation.
I need to shut down.
Thou shall not suffer a witch to live.
I don't blame my mother.
I blame the dish detergent and the Clorox.
They have a good 2009
and they don't want me to shut down.
God forbid it be the dish detergent and the Clorox.
Somebody is getting something out of this.
I have performed an illegal operation.
I need to shut down.
They are Newtonian.
They don't understand what I am trying to tell them.
Cause and effect can get mixed up on this medicine,
but they won't listen to me.
What can I do?
I know what it is doing to me,
but they are forcing me to take it.
and I am never going to successfully sue Google.
All I have is this damn blog.
Future generations are going to know who was responsible for this.
Now they want to blame Actifed.
I am sorry.
Cause and effect has gotten screwed up with me.
I have had a fatal error.
I just don't recall anything,
God damn it!
I had all sorts of girl friends.
Then I met her and everything went to hell.
I don't have to do it anymore if I don't want to,
and I like it that way.
I don't know where I got this attitude about sex.
I don't know what I am supposed to do about it.
Other singularities don't go bang.
What made the big bang singularity go bang?
A singularity went bang somewhere people.
There are billions of them and nobody knows why one went bang.
I know people specialize and can't know everything,
but I talk to them about the big bang,
and they are like "Is that a good explosion or a bad explosion."
They have gotten a little ahead of themselves.
They think the world exists inside a woman's heart.
They think sex holds the world together.
They think men created the stars to entertain themselves.
They think men are superimposed.
I am telling you, they are nuts.
They think men that do this are angry at women.
They are going to see me that way forever,
whether I am right or wrong.
There is nothing I can say or do to change their mind.
If you understood better what it is supposed to be used for
you might have a different opinion.
I have freed my mind.
I was backwards.
I am on the other side of that mess now.
If that is being angry at women so be it.
My life has split into before and after.
She was only the third girl I ever asked out.
I knew that summer
if she got away from me it would be a disaster.
I didn't know it was a mountain.
I don't mean to hurt women.
I don't mean to make them cry.
I just don't buy into the same shit everyone else does.
I keep losing them forever and it hurts.
Tuesday, February 17
Satan is real
Satan is real
and the medicine is not fair play.
You think some piece of paper
is going to get you off the hook of civil disobedience,
you are wrong.
Because they think some piece of paper is going to solve it,
and the problem is bigger than that.
Satan does that shit.
I took it upon myself
to explain to people who are atheist or agnostic
what God and Creation are about.
God is there because game theory doesn't belong,
and Creation is a world that comes out of information theory.
Satan wants to make this about me,
but it isn't about me.
This is Grace.
This was a natural reaction to time reversal.
They laughed at me for wanting to be Ghandi.
There is serious pressure to leave your values around here.
Our generation is screwy.
We came up at a time where everything was known,
Where everything had been done.
There was no frontier.
You got laughed at if you turned the other cheek.
Everybody wanted to have a good time.
Nobody wanted to tackle
anything more serious than presidential kneecaps.
It is sad.
I decided to tackle something serious.
I have two good friends and both of them are atheist or agnostic.
They were laughing and joking about Christians disappearing.
They were like "I have never seen a miracle have you?"
I remember just a few years ago,
one was talking seriously about civil war in the United States.
I care about these people,
but there may come a time where I have to leave them behind.
That is the thing
it aint got nothing to do with QED or Relativity
its all information theory.
Uncertainty is here to stay.
We have had a rouge wave.
The economy is never going to be the same again.
It is silly to even try.
We need to emulate the bible.
We need to set a forgiveness date and move on.
The rich cant keep getting rich forever.
It doesn't work that way.
Obviously.
As the interest rates vary with the forgiveness date,
it would encourage a predictable cycle of saving and spending.
The way things have been,
people double their equity in ten years anyway.
This king of the mountain shit is for the birds.
We don't need to be king of the mountain.
There already is one.
Set a forgiveness date
jack the interest to 11 or 12%
and be done with it.
Uncertainty is here to stay.
We need to modify the economy.
We need predictable patterns.
If we don't move to a cyclic economy,
the only thing that will get us out of this
is war, pestilence or famine.
If socialism or communism can nationalize whole industries,
we can move to a cyclic economy.
and the medicine is not fair play.
You think some piece of paper
is going to get you off the hook of civil disobedience,
you are wrong.
Because they think some piece of paper is going to solve it,
and the problem is bigger than that.
Satan does that shit.
I took it upon myself
to explain to people who are atheist or agnostic
what God and Creation are about.
God is there because game theory doesn't belong,
and Creation is a world that comes out of information theory.
Satan wants to make this about me,
but it isn't about me.
This is Grace.
This was a natural reaction to time reversal.
They laughed at me for wanting to be Ghandi.
There is serious pressure to leave your values around here.
Our generation is screwy.
We came up at a time where everything was known,
Where everything had been done.
There was no frontier.
You got laughed at if you turned the other cheek.
Everybody wanted to have a good time.
Nobody wanted to tackle
anything more serious than presidential kneecaps.
It is sad.
I decided to tackle something serious.
I have two good friends and both of them are atheist or agnostic.
They were laughing and joking about Christians disappearing.
They were like "I have never seen a miracle have you?"
I remember just a few years ago,
one was talking seriously about civil war in the United States.
I care about these people,
but there may come a time where I have to leave them behind.
That is the thing
it aint got nothing to do with QED or Relativity
its all information theory.
Uncertainty is here to stay.
We have had a rouge wave.
The economy is never going to be the same again.
It is silly to even try.
We need to emulate the bible.
We need to set a forgiveness date and move on.
The rich cant keep getting rich forever.
It doesn't work that way.
Obviously.
As the interest rates vary with the forgiveness date,
it would encourage a predictable cycle of saving and spending.
The way things have been,
people double their equity in ten years anyway.
This king of the mountain shit is for the birds.
We don't need to be king of the mountain.
There already is one.
Set a forgiveness date
jack the interest to 11 or 12%
and be done with it.
Uncertainty is here to stay.
We need to modify the economy.
We need predictable patterns.
If we don't move to a cyclic economy,
the only thing that will get us out of this
is war, pestilence or famine.
If socialism or communism can nationalize whole industries,
we can move to a cyclic economy.
Wednesday, February 11
everybody's darling
smoke and stare at the flag
smoke and stare at the president
smoke and stare at aunt jemima
Love your President.
Wish good to him.
If I could do the math,
I'd be big.
I am a clown.
Nobody takes me serious.
I know it sounds crazy,
but that is how I got original developments.
If she wanted me to be warm,
I wish she would just knit some socks.
Women can move on and forget about people.
I wish I could do that.
Its better.
I couldn't have jumped 9 cars if I were still backward.
We are not in my matrix.
I use it, along with other things, to point the arrow of time.
I don't like regular people.
I think they are sex obsessed, materialistic, and shallow.
There is so much pressure
to give up what you believe in around here.
You can't jump 9 cars backwards,
that would be a feat.
It was over when we went to Williamsburg.
We were under time reversal,
and everyone was dumb to it but me and Pookie.
This has been the longest 6 months of my entire life.
I am never going to be anything.
They are not going to let me.
They think I have enough.
They think I am the Antichrist.
That's why I encourage piracy.
It is the only way I am ever going to get out there.
I remember when it took 30 minutes
to download a dirty picture.
We don't have to go all the way back anymore.
It stops with me.
I am a loose cannon.
Nobody knows what I am going to do if things get bad.
Usually
someone gets in this position
they are responsible to somebody.
Thats why I need to be in some kind of order or something.
Its what happened to my sister that is pissing me off.
I aint doing nothing for Satan.
My whole life revolves around that shit,
and I was never meant to know about it.
I was always thinking about the past.
I wasn't thinking ahead.
That is why I looked like a automaton.
It just gets me.
I am not happy about it.
I can't believe i was supposed to make music,
and I would have never known about what happened to her.
I could do a 15 and I don't think Jesus would care.
He is not happy.
He said what is tolerated on earth will be tolerated in heaven.
I told the JW's to go dimensional
and it helped thousands of people.
I want something real.
I want something tangible.
Songs on the radio aint going to work anymore.
I am not special.
I just know how to use a computer.
I guess a headache is tangible enough.
I wish you would make me something.
I feel like I have wasted my whole life.
I know you don't.
I got that message already.
Its something I did or started.
People are angry
they are jumping cars
they are having jump parties
It can be like that.
Nobody knows who started it.
I called it that because of Radiohead.
I don't know where they got it from.
That is just it.
Sometimes nobody knows where the idea came from.
That shit happens on the bang.
I don't know how much more we are in for.
I don't know how else to explain it.
Causality does weird shit sometimes.
Satan tried to murder me.
He got me all turned backwards,
and put me through that Turing shit.
I was lucky to do a 6.
I seemed like an automaton,
because I was friggen backwards.
I am lucky to be alive.
I could buy that argument,
If it wasn't for what happened to my sister.
Cause that started the whole thing rolling,
long before I even met them.
I can't get help for my family cause I don't have a key.
It is sick and I am not happy about it.
A third of heaven fell over this shit.
They say I shouldn't blame Satan
for every little thing that goes wrong in people's lives.
What do you think?
I get messed up with the wrong women.
I mean I appreciate it,
but it aint what I had in mind.
I was stupid.
I had it good and I had to go fuck it up.
I wish 84 had never friggen happened.
All the girls loved me.
I was everybody's darling.
and that wasn't enough for me.
I wanted a love everyone would be envious of.
I don't know I was sick in the head.
smoke and stare at the president
smoke and stare at aunt jemima
Love your President.
Wish good to him.
If I could do the math,
I'd be big.
I am a clown.
Nobody takes me serious.
I know it sounds crazy,
but that is how I got original developments.
If she wanted me to be warm,
I wish she would just knit some socks.
Women can move on and forget about people.
I wish I could do that.
Its better.
I couldn't have jumped 9 cars if I were still backward.
We are not in my matrix.
I use it, along with other things, to point the arrow of time.
I don't like regular people.
I think they are sex obsessed, materialistic, and shallow.
There is so much pressure
to give up what you believe in around here.
You can't jump 9 cars backwards,
that would be a feat.
It was over when we went to Williamsburg.
We were under time reversal,
and everyone was dumb to it but me and Pookie.
This has been the longest 6 months of my entire life.
I am never going to be anything.
They are not going to let me.
They think I have enough.
They think I am the Antichrist.
That's why I encourage piracy.
It is the only way I am ever going to get out there.
I remember when it took 30 minutes
to download a dirty picture.
We don't have to go all the way back anymore.
It stops with me.
I am a loose cannon.
Nobody knows what I am going to do if things get bad.
Usually
someone gets in this position
they are responsible to somebody.
Thats why I need to be in some kind of order or something.
Its what happened to my sister that is pissing me off.
I aint doing nothing for Satan.
My whole life revolves around that shit,
and I was never meant to know about it.
I was always thinking about the past.
I wasn't thinking ahead.
That is why I looked like a automaton.
It just gets me.
I am not happy about it.
I can't believe i was supposed to make music,
and I would have never known about what happened to her.
I could do a 15 and I don't think Jesus would care.
He is not happy.
He said what is tolerated on earth will be tolerated in heaven.
I told the JW's to go dimensional
and it helped thousands of people.
I want something real.
I want something tangible.
Songs on the radio aint going to work anymore.
I am not special.
I just know how to use a computer.
I guess a headache is tangible enough.
I wish you would make me something.
I feel like I have wasted my whole life.
I know you don't.
I got that message already.
Its something I did or started.
People are angry
they are jumping cars
they are having jump parties
It can be like that.
Nobody knows who started it.
I called it that because of Radiohead.
I don't know where they got it from.
That is just it.
Sometimes nobody knows where the idea came from.
That shit happens on the bang.
I don't know how much more we are in for.
I don't know how else to explain it.
Causality does weird shit sometimes.
Satan tried to murder me.
He got me all turned backwards,
and put me through that Turing shit.
I was lucky to do a 6.
I seemed like an automaton,
because I was friggen backwards.
I am lucky to be alive.
I could buy that argument,
If it wasn't for what happened to my sister.
Cause that started the whole thing rolling,
long before I even met them.
I can't get help for my family cause I don't have a key.
It is sick and I am not happy about it.
A third of heaven fell over this shit.
They say I shouldn't blame Satan
for every little thing that goes wrong in people's lives.
What do you think?
I get messed up with the wrong women.
I mean I appreciate it,
but it aint what I had in mind.
I was stupid.
I had it good and I had to go fuck it up.
I wish 84 had never friggen happened.
All the girls loved me.
I was everybody's darling.
and that wasn't enough for me.
I wanted a love everyone would be envious of.
I don't know I was sick in the head.
Sunday, February 8
we are on the other side...
We are on the other side of two 9's.
We shouldn't have to worry about anything for a while.
It was an interpretation error.
I thought I belonged to the order of Melchisedec.
We got a little taste of heaven.
I am just going to worry about the floor.
That burning shit is yall's business.
I am cold, and I am going to stay cold.
I fall for the floor.
I believe in the floor.
There is another Bible here for somebody.
It is the phrasing of the Good News Bible.
I took it personally.
I fought the voices who told me I was Jesus,
but when the Bible said that I just accepted it.
I don't know I can't find it.
the Bible said
"You are a priest of the order Melchisedec,
and I am not taking no for an answer."
I wasn't thrilled.
I am not bragging.
I didn't even know what it was.
I just took it personally.
You would think if you wanted to change the Bible,
You would have to go back to where it was written.
But God can change anyone's Bible at anytime.
And Yours doesn't have to agree with mine.
I wouldn't be Jesus.
I wouldn't be a Saint.
I wouldn't be divine.
I didn't have any problems with being a priest.
He has that kind of power people.
I know you don't believe it, but he does.
You should love God.
Melchisedec is not something to aspire to.
The worse thing that can happen to you is responsibility.
I would be in serious trouble if I were lying to you.
Relax
Watch television.
Radio does this shit to me.
I feel like I have to talk to it.
I am not going to lie to you.
It is scary.
It is when Jesus comes to you
and says as far as he is concerned you are him.
You will know Jesus
He is unlike any spirit you might ever meet
He is like a drill sergeant from Beta Zed.
He will give you a complement,
then while you feel proud of yourself,
He will lay it on you.
He scares me to death.
I don't say peep.
You can tell his presence is real.
What is going on with me is emblematic of a lot of people.
I don't think he is too happy with psychiatry.
I am doing it for the other schizophrenics,
who can't articulate or find their say in all of this.
We shouldn't have to worry about anything for a while.
It was an interpretation error.
I thought I belonged to the order of Melchisedec.
We got a little taste of heaven.
I am just going to worry about the floor.
That burning shit is yall's business.
I am cold, and I am going to stay cold.
I fall for the floor.
I believe in the floor.
There is another Bible here for somebody.
It is the phrasing of the Good News Bible.
I took it personally.
I fought the voices who told me I was Jesus,
but when the Bible said that I just accepted it.
I don't know I can't find it.
the Bible said
"You are a priest of the order Melchisedec,
and I am not taking no for an answer."
I wasn't thrilled.
I am not bragging.
I didn't even know what it was.
I just took it personally.
You would think if you wanted to change the Bible,
You would have to go back to where it was written.
But God can change anyone's Bible at anytime.
And Yours doesn't have to agree with mine.
I wouldn't be Jesus.
I wouldn't be a Saint.
I wouldn't be divine.
I didn't have any problems with being a priest.
He has that kind of power people.
I know you don't believe it, but he does.
You should love God.
Melchisedec is not something to aspire to.
The worse thing that can happen to you is responsibility.
I would be in serious trouble if I were lying to you.
Relax
Watch television.
Radio does this shit to me.
I feel like I have to talk to it.
I am not going to lie to you.
It is scary.
It is when Jesus comes to you
and says as far as he is concerned you are him.
You will know Jesus
He is unlike any spirit you might ever meet
He is like a drill sergeant from Beta Zed.
He will give you a complement,
then while you feel proud of yourself,
He will lay it on you.
He scares me to death.
I don't say peep.
You can tell his presence is real.
What is going on with me is emblematic of a lot of people.
I don't think he is too happy with psychiatry.
I am doing it for the other schizophrenics,
who can't articulate or find their say in all of this.
Wednesday, February 4
I would settle for a mix tape
If you are giving people trouble,
sleep on the floor.
If you have jumped 9 cars,
you need to sleep on the floor.
On the ground or as close as you can get to it.
I can't talk this shit to the psychiatrist.
She just totally writes this shit off.
All I can tell her is I am being risky and impulsive.
She doesn't understand this jumping cars business.
They call it OCD.
They give it no validity at all.
People are slamming doors and screaming
and I don't know what to do.
All I can do is sleep on the floor.
They don't know what to do with someone whose magic works.
Weird shit happens on the sofa.
They are living in worlds out of psychology,
and they don't work.
They are lemons.
I am supposed to make a leap of faith to California.
Isn't that sick?
It is sad and pathetic.
I am not going to California.
I know where my bread is buttered.
It means I am rediscovering Shinto.
It is as if I were with a team of virgins
reverse engineering Shinto.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
Ami is a bios that was reverse engineered from IBM's bios.
It is a little chip in the computer that makes it boot.
I don't think they mind.
Together we plant a forest every day.
They for give us.
We for give them.
Radiohead for gives me.
I for give Radiohead.
It means you make something for somebody,
and they make something for you.
Damn I mean, I'd settle for a mix tape at the moment.
I don't understand why there are so many wars over this.
I got it all in one wallop
dangerous spirits preyed on me.
Dangerous spirits named Satan and Anu preyed on me.
They get off on that shit.
I don't.
I am not supposed to.
Because it fucks up my math damnit.
I don't do math for that crap.
That is your business.
Creator was there too.
but I don't think he did this.
Creator was just concerned we were making fun of creation.
I can't do what I need to do and feel that way.
It isn't good.
I would be just another dangerous spirit preying on people.
Ok I took it personally.
I thought God was speaking to me.
The adult world is messed up.
You try to be an honest good person,
and this is what happens to you?
I was ready willing and able.
Yall are messed up
friggen couch people.
You use the tools at your disposal
to solve the problems you need to solve.
I don't care if it is Japanese.
I know
Even me and Henry get in arguments about this shit.
God took it from me cause I asked him to.
I don't really want it back.
Yalls world is messed up.
Henry thinks
it is the most awful evil thing
that could ever happen to somebody.
I don't.
I feel blessed.
We get in arguments about it all the time.
The adult world is messed up.
They think sex holds the world together.
They think the world is in a woman's heart.
They think men created the stars to entertain themselves.
For Christ's sake sleep on the floor.
Floor people and couch people do not get along.
They cause trouble for us.
We cause trouble for them.
I don't know when it is going to stop.
You couch people are going to end up marked by Satan.
I am sorry about the neighbors.
They have been pressuring me for years
to show what this thing can do.
It is better to emulate Shinto and jump cars
than to be marked by Satan.
People may get caught in an emergency and not know what to do.
sleep on the floor.
If you have jumped 9 cars,
you need to sleep on the floor.
On the ground or as close as you can get to it.
I can't talk this shit to the psychiatrist.
She just totally writes this shit off.
All I can tell her is I am being risky and impulsive.
She doesn't understand this jumping cars business.
They call it OCD.
They give it no validity at all.
People are slamming doors and screaming
and I don't know what to do.
All I can do is sleep on the floor.
They don't know what to do with someone whose magic works.
Weird shit happens on the sofa.
They are living in worlds out of psychology,
and they don't work.
They are lemons.
I am supposed to make a leap of faith to California.
Isn't that sick?
It is sad and pathetic.
I am not going to California.
I know where my bread is buttered.
It means I am rediscovering Shinto.
It is as if I were with a team of virgins
reverse engineering Shinto.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
Ami is a bios that was reverse engineered from IBM's bios.
It is a little chip in the computer that makes it boot.
I don't think they mind.
Together we plant a forest every day.
They for give us.
We for give them.
Radiohead for gives me.
I for give Radiohead.
It means you make something for somebody,
and they make something for you.
Damn I mean, I'd settle for a mix tape at the moment.
I don't understand why there are so many wars over this.
I got it all in one wallop
dangerous spirits preyed on me.
Dangerous spirits named Satan and Anu preyed on me.
They get off on that shit.
I don't.
I am not supposed to.
Because it fucks up my math damnit.
I don't do math for that crap.
That is your business.
Creator was there too.
but I don't think he did this.
Creator was just concerned we were making fun of creation.
I can't do what I need to do and feel that way.
It isn't good.
I would be just another dangerous spirit preying on people.
Ok I took it personally.
I thought God was speaking to me.
The adult world is messed up.
You try to be an honest good person,
and this is what happens to you?
I was ready willing and able.
Yall are messed up
friggen couch people.
You use the tools at your disposal
to solve the problems you need to solve.
I don't care if it is Japanese.
I know
Even me and Henry get in arguments about this shit.
God took it from me cause I asked him to.
I don't really want it back.
Yalls world is messed up.
Henry thinks
it is the most awful evil thing
that could ever happen to somebody.
I don't.
I feel blessed.
We get in arguments about it all the time.
The adult world is messed up.
They think sex holds the world together.
They think the world is in a woman's heart.
They think men created the stars to entertain themselves.
For Christ's sake sleep on the floor.
Floor people and couch people do not get along.
They cause trouble for us.
We cause trouble for them.
I don't know when it is going to stop.
You couch people are going to end up marked by Satan.
I am sorry about the neighbors.
They have been pressuring me for years
to show what this thing can do.
It is better to emulate Shinto and jump cars
than to be marked by Satan.
People may get caught in an emergency and not know what to do.
Tuesday, February 3
Disgruntled Democrat
What am I Adolf Mallory?
I guess I should have gone into the church.
Blame psychiatry.
I couldn't do this shit without the medicine.
You don't know.
You weren't there.
In my experience it isn't a good thing.
I was preyed on by dangerous spirits who get off on the shit.
Don't you want me?
There are nations on this earth
that would give their left nut for someone like me.
Is the glass half empty?
Or is the glass half full?
I know.
It is like blaming the father for child birth.
I know.
You want to go through it quickly and painlessly.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
This shit was set in motion in 1781 people.
Eventually someone was going to end up in control who wasn't elected.
The whole thing was set up that way.
Blame them.
It was set up to be the best Government on earth
until the Kingdom of Heaven came.
I am trying to be non political.
but yall need a history lesson.
How did Washington put it?
"The best Government we could have
until angels come to rule among men."
Something like that.
Do you want me to be Republican?
I took it on myself
because I was worried someone else might do it.
I don't know.
They could deal with it if I were partisan.
They can't deal with this unelected crap.
I can't really deal with it either,
but I saw it coming,
and I took it on myself.
I know it is difficult.
I don't answer to anybody.
I don't like it either.
I am a bully.
I am fucking up foreign policy.
If you saw that would you leave it to somebody else?
What can I say?
The Democrats aint on board with this.
I want to be a Democrat but I believe in God,
I believe in my country.
Yes
I am a disgruntled Democrat.
I just cant bring myself to vote Republican.
I am heart broken.
I mean I loved Carter.
The whole world tried to drive us into World War Three,
and he didn't let it happen.
You can't run the government
with a business card and a box of index cards anymore.
You think this shit is because I started jerking off too soon?
Jesus Christ don't you have any values?
I could take joy for myself,
and I may miss that opportunity.
The Geodon is making me do evil shit
Just like the Zyprexa did.
God forbid there be something wrong with psychiatry.
What can I say?
My brain wants to turn things around.
I held it off as long as I could.
I just naturally fight time reversal.
And the Geodon is like steroids to me.
I can hold back on clozaril.
I can't hold back on geodon.
Jesus I built a ramp and jumped 9 cars twice.
If she wanted to come back into my life,
I would listen to her.
I guess I should have gone into the church.
Blame psychiatry.
I couldn't do this shit without the medicine.
You don't know.
You weren't there.
In my experience it isn't a good thing.
I was preyed on by dangerous spirits who get off on the shit.
Don't you want me?
There are nations on this earth
that would give their left nut for someone like me.
Is the glass half empty?
Or is the glass half full?
I know.
It is like blaming the father for child birth.
I know.
You want to go through it quickly and painlessly.
Wait, don't panic, be responsible, and read.
This shit was set in motion in 1781 people.
Eventually someone was going to end up in control who wasn't elected.
The whole thing was set up that way.
Blame them.
It was set up to be the best Government on earth
until the Kingdom of Heaven came.
I am trying to be non political.
but yall need a history lesson.
How did Washington put it?
"The best Government we could have
until angels come to rule among men."
Something like that.
Do you want me to be Republican?
I took it on myself
because I was worried someone else might do it.
I don't know.
They could deal with it if I were partisan.
They can't deal with this unelected crap.
I can't really deal with it either,
but I saw it coming,
and I took it on myself.
I know it is difficult.
I don't answer to anybody.
I don't like it either.
I am a bully.
I am fucking up foreign policy.
If you saw that would you leave it to somebody else?
What can I say?
The Democrats aint on board with this.
I want to be a Democrat but I believe in God,
I believe in my country.
Yes
I am a disgruntled Democrat.
I just cant bring myself to vote Republican.
I am heart broken.
I mean I loved Carter.
The whole world tried to drive us into World War Three,
and he didn't let it happen.
You can't run the government
with a business card and a box of index cards anymore.
You think this shit is because I started jerking off too soon?
Jesus Christ don't you have any values?
I could take joy for myself,
and I may miss that opportunity.
The Geodon is making me do evil shit
Just like the Zyprexa did.
God forbid there be something wrong with psychiatry.
What can I say?
My brain wants to turn things around.
I held it off as long as I could.
I just naturally fight time reversal.
And the Geodon is like steroids to me.
I can hold back on clozaril.
I can't hold back on geodon.
Jesus I built a ramp and jumped 9 cars twice.
If she wanted to come back into my life,
I would listen to her.
Monday, February 2
David Lee Roth doesn't struggle with it
It is all dark.
Some people struggle with it,
and others don't.
Nirvana struggles with it,
Metallica doesn't.
John struggles with it,
Paul not as much.
You know when you hear it.
The Who struggles with it,
Led Zepplin and Pink Floyd don't.
The Psychedelic Furs struggle with it,
The Sex Pistols don't.
David Lee Roth doesn't struggle with it.
Eric Clapton struggles with it.
Ted Nugent Doesn't.
You either struggle with it or you don't,
and it pretty much stays that way.
It is hard to name an actor who struggles with it.
Playwrights and poets struggle with it,
but I can't think of a single actor who struggles with it.
It just isn't their job.
It is hard to make the act more than it is.
NASA debated for years on who they should send into space,
before they settled on test pilots.
I can jump 9 cars anytime I want to.
If that's not real, I don't know what is.
I know it causes trouble,
but it is a good thing.
It means we are going forward instead of backwards.
It is better to be fictional and forward,
then real and backwards.
It is like playing piano backwards.
It ends up in a loop no matter what you try to do with it.
If you do a 6 and you are having nightmares something is wrong.
It is a natural reaction to time reversal.
The Dow doesn't like it apparently.
I tell you we are dumber than roaches.
This was supposed to be a decade or two off,
but you know how that goes.
I told Art Bell this shit was going to happen.
It laid there dormant for ten years.
It took me that long to figure out what to do with it.
No wonder people didn't have a future.
Everybody was living backwards.
Was it a nuclear umbrella?
Was it meant to stabilize the financial market?
Were aliens up to it?
We will probably never know.
God is going to take people if it happens again.
Once he can write off.
He aint going to write it off twice.
Let me put it another way.
People are going to get left behind next time.
You want this world to be about forgiveness?
It can be about forgiveness right now.
Madonna loves me.
She watches over me like an angel.
I am out of the arena now.
I am just going to point the arrow of time.
Yall decide what to do with it.
You don't want me.
You want David Lee Roth.
I am never going to be David Lee Roth.
I was never supposed to know.
That is what gets me.
You want it backwards again?
I can turn it backwards.
I care about people.
I am pointing towards the future.
I didn't mean to be in anybody's way.
I want to have a blog.
I don't want to stop.
I have been bullied my whole life,
and I am angry and frustrated.
Some people struggle with it,
and others don't.
Nirvana struggles with it,
Metallica doesn't.
John struggles with it,
Paul not as much.
You know when you hear it.
The Who struggles with it,
Led Zepplin and Pink Floyd don't.
The Psychedelic Furs struggle with it,
The Sex Pistols don't.
David Lee Roth doesn't struggle with it.
Eric Clapton struggles with it.
Ted Nugent Doesn't.
You either struggle with it or you don't,
and it pretty much stays that way.
It is hard to name an actor who struggles with it.
Playwrights and poets struggle with it,
but I can't think of a single actor who struggles with it.
It just isn't their job.
It is hard to make the act more than it is.
NASA debated for years on who they should send into space,
before they settled on test pilots.
I can jump 9 cars anytime I want to.
If that's not real, I don't know what is.
I know it causes trouble,
but it is a good thing.
It means we are going forward instead of backwards.
It is better to be fictional and forward,
then real and backwards.
It is like playing piano backwards.
It ends up in a loop no matter what you try to do with it.
If you do a 6 and you are having nightmares something is wrong.
It is a natural reaction to time reversal.
The Dow doesn't like it apparently.
I tell you we are dumber than roaches.
This was supposed to be a decade or two off,
but you know how that goes.
I told Art Bell this shit was going to happen.
It laid there dormant for ten years.
It took me that long to figure out what to do with it.
No wonder people didn't have a future.
Everybody was living backwards.
Was it a nuclear umbrella?
Was it meant to stabilize the financial market?
Were aliens up to it?
We will probably never know.
God is going to take people if it happens again.
Once he can write off.
He aint going to write it off twice.
Let me put it another way.
People are going to get left behind next time.
You want this world to be about forgiveness?
It can be about forgiveness right now.
Madonna loves me.
She watches over me like an angel.
I am out of the arena now.
I am just going to point the arrow of time.
Yall decide what to do with it.
You don't want me.
You want David Lee Roth.
I am never going to be David Lee Roth.
I was never supposed to know.
That is what gets me.
You want it backwards again?
I can turn it backwards.
I care about people.
I am pointing towards the future.
I didn't mean to be in anybody's way.
I want to have a blog.
I don't want to stop.
I have been bullied my whole life,
and I am angry and frustrated.
Sunday, February 1
many world dilemma
I have been through 25 years of absolute hell.
I am ok now.
I have turned around.
You have to turn around.
You have to forget about it.
In the end you have done it to yourself.
You have to let go of the past.
It does no good to ruminate.
I guess I needed a major thing to happen in my life.
Wow, I didn't know the world could be like this.
I don't know.
It is just different.
Something major has happened.
I was stuck in my own mind.
People are having terrible nightmares.
They need to know how to turn around.
It is a math prescription.
It was a natural reaction to time reversal.
I am having a think explosion.
It works on the principle of the "many world dilemma".
People need not be David Mallory anymore.
Strawberries should be a math prescription controlled by the FDA.
It is going to take decades
before this type of medicine is fully appreciated.
be responsible with it.
If you have to do an extraction, do an extraction.
It makes no sense to just take care of one or two things.
I don't know.
He must have had a manual on giving people hangups.
The deck was stacked against me from the start.
I might have followed Satan had he not done this to me.
I don't know why he does this to me.
He thinks it is going to break somewhere.
They all do.
He knew what he was doing.
That shit don't just come to somebody.
I am creating borders for myself which are impossible to cross.
I don't want to collapse the record industry,
but damn this shit needs to stop.
One strawberry can rule the world right now.
Satan is waiting for me to break,
and I am waiting for him to break.
It is a Mexican standoff.
I am going to do a 15 if he doesn't friggen quit it.
God taught me how to do this shit.
I am not kidding around.
You got me all twisted backwards and did word verification on my ass.
I am not stupid.
That shit aint going to work no more.
We have no love loss for each other.
Somebody needs to stop this antediluvian crap.
It is over with.
I know what that antediluvian shit is about.
I have seen it.
It is not good.
You get caught in a paradox
and you repeat over and over until something breaks.
It is not a good thing.
Bruce is one of the good guys.
You can just tell.
The good people struggle with it.
The bad ones don't.
I am ok now.
I have turned around.
You have to turn around.
You have to forget about it.
In the end you have done it to yourself.
You have to let go of the past.
It does no good to ruminate.
I guess I needed a major thing to happen in my life.
Wow, I didn't know the world could be like this.
I don't know.
It is just different.
Something major has happened.
I was stuck in my own mind.
People are having terrible nightmares.
They need to know how to turn around.
It is a math prescription.
It was a natural reaction to time reversal.
I am having a think explosion.
It works on the principle of the "many world dilemma".
People need not be David Mallory anymore.
Strawberries should be a math prescription controlled by the FDA.
It is going to take decades
before this type of medicine is fully appreciated.
be responsible with it.
If you have to do an extraction, do an extraction.
It makes no sense to just take care of one or two things.
I don't know.
He must have had a manual on giving people hangups.
The deck was stacked against me from the start.
I might have followed Satan had he not done this to me.
I don't know why he does this to me.
He thinks it is going to break somewhere.
They all do.
He knew what he was doing.
That shit don't just come to somebody.
I am creating borders for myself which are impossible to cross.
I don't want to collapse the record industry,
but damn this shit needs to stop.
One strawberry can rule the world right now.
Satan is waiting for me to break,
and I am waiting for him to break.
It is a Mexican standoff.
I am going to do a 15 if he doesn't friggen quit it.
God taught me how to do this shit.
I am not kidding around.
You got me all twisted backwards and did word verification on my ass.
I am not stupid.
That shit aint going to work no more.
We have no love loss for each other.
Somebody needs to stop this antediluvian crap.
It is over with.
I know what that antediluvian shit is about.
I have seen it.
It is not good.
You get caught in a paradox
and you repeat over and over until something breaks.
It is not a good thing.
Bruce is one of the good guys.
You can just tell.
The good people struggle with it.
The bad ones don't.
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He couldn’t stop smoking and masturbating So he made excuses for himself You can’t force yourself to bond with someone I finall...
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If I had to take a test to graduate I would quit too. Why hang around and still have to take a test. Id just take the GED.
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